MIT ESAAY || WHICH DEPARTMENT APPEALS YOU MOST AND WHY || HELP- need to improve

I have prepared a sample but it exceeds word limit and lacks continuity. I really could use some help.

Although you may not yet know what you want to major in, which department or program at MIT appeals to you and why? (*) (100 words or fewer)

I have always been fascinated by computers. My father himself owned a small computer shop where I would go and play with the parts. He would not let me touch new computers or ones which were put for selling. I would put my hands to whatever I could get, software or machines and try to experiment with them without guidance.

As I grew up this curiosity grew and I always wanted to major in Computer Science but could not get the chance in recent college years. I always do whatever I could to feed my curiosity by sitting with CS students and experimenting on my laptop.

Computers is my field of interest and it appeals me most

I always **did** whatever I could to feed my curiosity by sitting with CS students and experimenting on my laptop.

Alternatively

I fed my curiosity for CS through associating with like-minded students and developing programs as a team.

m sorry but i never developed a program but just saw them and try to learn from them

You don't mention about programs at MIT, I think they really want you to do that. They want to make sure that you did not just pick their college, they want to know if you actually did research and understand why you are going there.

I revised your introduction to make it only 44 words. Use the rest of the remaining word count to explain why the computer science department of MIT appeals to you now. That is the aspect of the essay that you must develop very well in order to respond to the statement prompt.

I grew up with a fascination for computers since I spent my developing years as a fixture in my father's computer shop. My curiosity in terms of hardware and software development were fueled by this exposure thus giving me an interest in computer science.