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Essay about my negative experience with someone else's culture



deanne 2 / 3  
Nov 28, 2009   #1
Part 2 for personal statement

Directions: Describe an experience of cultural difference, positive or negative, you have had or observed. What did you learn from it?

I know I am a Chinese American, but I never noticed the difference between me and my blonde Barbie doll. When I was little, diversity wasn't something my eyes could spot out. To me, I always felt like everyone looked the same. As a child I never learned the ability to focus on somebody's looks; that is until one day I invited my neighbor over to my house who happened to be an African American. My neighbor and I were bicycling earlier and he wanted a cup of water to drink. My aunt was babysitting me that day and when she saw him, she tried to kick him out of the house. The memory of my aunt telling him to leave was very unclear because I didn't know what was happening at the time. After he left the house, my aunt yelled at me for letting him in. I was still young and didn't understand what was happening and why she got so angry at me. Later that night, my parents came home and my aunt had a talk with them. Apparently my aunt was afraid that my neighbor was going to steal our things because she heard that African Americans tend to steal. Since that day her words puzzle me whenever I look at a "black" person. I started to notice that the kids at school had different eye color, hair texture, and facial structures. Then I would see that kids at school eat different foods than I would eat a home and that not everyone celebrates the same holidays as I do such as Chinese New Years. Eventually, kids at school would tell me that my eyes were small and I was too short. This is when I started to realize I wasn't comparable to Barbie's looks. Although it was hard to accept what I really looked like to people and how different our lifestyles were, I still stick to the fact that we are all the same. Even though my eyes may be smaller, there is no difference in my vision in comparison to others and what I eat may be different from what others eat, but we all still require food to live. To me my neighbor wasn't a thief because he never stole from me and how my aunt had reacted towards his appearance only bettered me as a person to accept people regardless of their looks.

can anyone tell me what i can do to make this better/ any errors?/ anything i don't need?/ does it answer the question in the direction?/ does it catch your attention?/ suggestions?

lilgangwolf 5 / 13  
Nov 28, 2009   #2
write more about how it affected you presently
right now, its mostly all in the past.
you need to say because of this, my mentality right now is this.

but i like your essay,
you just need to make it more about the present you, relate it back i mean
OP deanne 2 / 3  
Nov 28, 2009   #3
thank you so much! you have no idea how much i appreciate you taking your time on this!


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