"Once I was; Now I am" - personal narrative

Prompt/instruction:

facweb.northseattle.edu/mtenenba/eng101Wtr11/Essay1PersonalNarrative.p df

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The essay is still incomplete but I wanted to see if I was on the right track. (writers block on the "now I" part.

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Once I used to play games everyday; Now I focus on my life. I used to play video games 15 hours a day 7 days a week. I've wasted a lot of time and money buying video games and regret it. Gaming also took a huge part on me failing academically. Now I focus on my life, Attending school and focusing on graduating college. I hang out with friends rather then sit at a computer playing with strangers. Spend money on smarter things.

When I used to play video games everyday I would stay up until midnight, and head to school half asleep. After school ends I would head home and go straight to playing games, I would even skip school some days. When ever I am playing games I would always tell my self that I will do my homework or do my chores later, but always ending up either holding it off or not doing it at all. Some days I would stay up for 48hours straight.

The amount of time and money I wasted on playing video games is so high that it feels impossible to count. I had to buy every block buster game that came out and would spend hours and hours playing it. It felt as if I didn't play the game it would have been a waste, but buying it was already the waste. I'd have stacks of games in my room that I never played more then once. I wish I never got addicted to games so hard, and did something more pro active in my life.

Also, gaming all the time kept me from doing school work, homework, or any other work. I would get so tired the next day that I just fall asleep in class, and won't even hear a word the teacher says. All I could think about was going home and playing games. I didn't care at all about passing, doing homework, participating or anything school related. Addiction to games clouded me from thinking about real life and what is ahead.

(incomplete)
Now I focus on my life. I am trying my best at school to pass each class and graduate from college. I keep my self from falling asleep in class and pay attention to the professor. I have all my required necessities for all my classes

Once upon a time I used to played games everyday; Now I focus on my life. I used to play video games 15fifteen hours a day and seven days a week. I have wasted a lot of time and money buying video games and have come to regret it. Gaming also took a large toll on my academics . Now I focus on my life, a ttending school and focusing on graduating college. I hang out with friends rather then sit at a computer playing with strangers. I spend money on smarter things.

When I used to play video games everyday I would stay up until midnight, and head to school half asleep. After school ends , I would head home and go straight to playing games, I would even skip school some days. Whenever I played games, I would tell myself that I would do my homework or do my chores later , but always ending up either holding it off or not doing it at all. Some days I would stay up for forty-eight hours straight.

The amount of time and money I wasted on playing video games is so high that it feels impossible to count. I had to buy every block buster game that came out and would spend hours and hours playing it. It felt as if I didn't play the game it would have been a waste, but buying it was already the waste. I'd have stacks of games in my room that I never played more then once. I wish I never got addicted to games so hard, and did something more proactive with my life.

The stuff stated in this paragraph was already said in the last so I would take it out to avoid redundancy.
Also, gaming all the time kept me from doing school work, homework, or any other work. I would get so tired the next day that I just fall asleep in class, and won't even hear a word the teacher says. All I could think about was going home and playing games. I didn't care at all about passing, doing homework, participating or anything school related. Addiction to games clouded me from thinking about real life and what is ahead.

I would revise this essay to be more focused on the solution and how you overcame the problem than the problem itself. I believe this direction would be better.

SO basically the NOw first then what I wrote for once I at the end?

Sorry, I need a lott of examples to get something >.<

EDIT: never read it wrong, so solution and how I solve it? Don't know what to write about.

I would just have the part about your problem summed up in a few lines, then from there I would continue to only discuss how it has effected and helped you succeed at your current stage of life. Maybe something like how you have matured or refocused yourself.