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How will opportunities at Purdue support your interests, both in and out of the classroom?


digvijay 1 / -  
Dec 30, 2014   #1
-----------------------100 words or fewer--------------------------------
Since I was a child I had aspirations of becoming an engineer. A chance to study at Purdue will give me the opportunity to be educated by one of the best faculties and research something

I'm truly enthusiastic about and in the field that truly appeals to me. Meanwhile, it'll grant me an opportunity to interact with people of multiple backgrounds and to participate in numerous activities which'll help me to discover a whole new side of myself. Years at Purdue will turn me from a naive high school boy to a proficient and adept engineer.

----------------------What possible changes can I make to this statement which'll make it even more appealing to the reader----------------------Please help.
SineFine 2 / 7 2  
Dec 31, 2014   #2
Your response is somewhat generic. You could literally take out every time you mention Purdue and type in the name of another school. I'd recommend including some specifics like where you claimed that Purdue's faculty is one of the best (how so?), where you mentioned research (how will Purdue enable you?), and where you mentioned the numerous activities you want to participate in(name a few?). I understand that a 100 word limit is hard to work with and you already have 96 words, but I'm just offering suggestions.


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