Hi everyone :) I was hoping you could give me feedback on my application essay and tweak it so that I will have the best chance at being accepted. I am applying to the general first year (TrackOne) if that is important. What i have copied is about 1500 characters, so I'm about half way done.
Question:
Please write a brief essay that answers the following questions. (3000 Characters Maximum)
What has inspired you to pursue an engineering degree and why would you like to study at the University of Toronto?
What skills have you developed through your extra-curricular experiences that will support your future success as both a student and an engineer?
Answer:
For as long as I can remember I have always had a passion for building. I started with simple wooden blocks and eventually worked my way into building massive cities and creations out of thousands of pieces of LEGO blocks. Looking back, I figure it was the limitless possibilities that first attracted me to these blocks and keeps me passionate about creation and engineering today. My parents also introduced me to computers at a very young age and I was equally amazed at all the things they could do while not moving at all. Wondering how this seemingly invisible force managed to create the colours on the screen, I quickly began researching how exactly a computer and electricity works. Even today, I still get excited about researching the latest technology and topics in the world of computers, physics and engineering. In fact, it was an article published by the University of Toronto that inspired me to pursue and education at a prestigious university such as the University of Toronto. I felt very lucky to have a leader in my areas of interest so close to my home that would allow me to pursue my passions in full.
I knew that in order to be accepted at the University of Toronto I would have to develop important leadership skills along with proving my passion and aptitude for engineering. I always look to practice and hone my qualities as a leader and have done this through activities such as the swimming team, badminton team and classroom assignments.
Question:
Please write a brief essay that answers the following questions. (3000 Characters Maximum)
What has inspired you to pursue an engineering degree and why would you like to study at the University of Toronto?
What skills have you developed through your extra-curricular experiences that will support your future success as both a student and an engineer?
Answer:
For as long as I can remember I have always had a passion for building. I started with simple wooden blocks and eventually worked my way into building massive cities and creations out of thousands of pieces of LEGO blocks. Looking back, I figure it was the limitless possibilities that first attracted me to these blocks and keeps me passionate about creation and engineering today. My parents also introduced me to computers at a very young age and I was equally amazed at all the things they could do while not moving at all. Wondering how this seemingly invisible force managed to create the colours on the screen, I quickly began researching how exactly a computer and electricity works. Even today, I still get excited about researching the latest technology and topics in the world of computers, physics and engineering. In fact, it was an article published by the University of Toronto that inspired me to pursue and education at a prestigious university such as the University of Toronto. I felt very lucky to have a leader in my areas of interest so close to my home that would allow me to pursue my passions in full.
I knew that in order to be accepted at the University of Toronto I would have to develop important leadership skills along with proving my passion and aptitude for engineering. I always look to practice and hone my qualities as a leader and have done this through activities such as the swimming team, badminton team and classroom assignments.
