I'll read yours!!The Perks of Being Literate
I've always been a bit odd. Some people have even gone as far to say that my elevator doesn't quite reach the top floor. Yes, I'll be honest, my mind does wander astray one too many times a day; and I'll be the first to admit that the word 'habit' doesn't quite suffice for my daydreaming tendencies, which have transformed themselves into more of a lifestyle. In my elementary school days, I was the girl that sat in the back of the class, too shy to utter more than a few words every hour or so. And my timidity didn't end there. It followed me back home like a lost puppy on a cold, rainy day, permanently appending itself onto my personality. Even my own mother found it difficult to carry on a conversation with me before I inched back into my shell that became more of a home to me than my actual physical residence.
I never really understood why I was so introverted. It's not like I didn't have anything to say. Thoughts were constantly buzzing around in my head and I held a strong opinion on practically everything. But something in my mind kept my ideas fettered within the bounds of my skull, refusing to loosen its clutch. I felt ensnared, almost feeble. And it wasn't like I couldn't ask someone for help; the only problem was there was not an ounce of courage or confidence in me capable of doing so. My life, it seemed, was doomed.
But then, I discovered The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky, the book that would ultimately change how I live my life. To be honest, at first I didn't have a clue why this novel, out of the other powerful, influential ones I had read, impacted me so much. I found myself reading the last few pages in tears, but still, I didn't have any idea why. It wasn't until I put the book down, closed my eyes, and reflected on my own life that I realized the book was about me. Everything the main character Charlie did, said, thought, and believed mirrored my life perfectly. Charlie lived his life within himself; I lived my life within myself. Charlie struggled to speak his mind; I struggle to speak my mind. Charlie stood on the sidelines as life passed him by; I stood on the sidelines as life passed me by. I was forced to acknowledge my own flaws and fix those that were preventing me from becoming who I really am.
To sum it up, I've learned that in order to be honest with myself, I needed to be honest with others. It dawned on me that the reason why I was so reticent and afraid to be myself was because, as shallow as it sounds, I was worried what others would think. I was constantly trying to win the approval of those around me, so much so that I lost the approval of myself. I had become a sheer shadow of my true personality, my true thoughts, and my true beliefs. Now, I live my life for me, not for others. Because as clichï as it sounds, I'll only live once; so why not make the most of life while I actually can?
Please let me know what you think and be 100% honest. I'm desperate!
& I'll read yours too if you would like (: