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'The Phantom of the Opera' ; NYU Supplement "What Intrigues You"



shreebaby 3 / 4  
Jan 1, 2013   #1
Thanks in advance for any feedback!

PROMPT: What intrigues you? Tell us about one work of art, scientific achievement, piece of literature, method of communication, or place in the world (a film, book, performance, website, event, location, etc.), and explain its significance to you.

As I sat in my seat, I thought to myself, "This is going to be so boring." My orchestra director dimmed the lights, and started to praise the work we were about to watch. "The twenty-fifth anniversary production of 'The Phantom of the Opera' is one of the best I have ever seen, and I'm sure you all will love it just as much as I do." He said. I scoffed and rolled my eyes at the comment as the musical started. As the production continued, I learned that every piece of dialogue was said in song. "Great," I mumbled, "Now I have to pay even more attention to the words!" As I tried my best to focus on the plot, I became enamored by the orchestration in its entirety. The reoccurring melodies, the singable tunes, and the fabulous costumes quickly captivated me and placed me in a trance.

I was hooked. I had to admit, I was surprised at my drastic change of heart. I spent the next several days researching the musical and even bought the soundtrack. I found myself getting more and more absorbed into musical theater and started to explore. Ever since that day in orchestra class, I have enjoyed and have learned to respect musicals as an art form. Since my initial viewing, I have seen "Phantom" countless other times. "Phantom" does not have a typical boy-meets-girl plot. It is full of plot twists, dark themes, and a bit of whimsy. It became the perfect production to stick my foot into the door of musicals, where I am rarely displeased from what I see and hear.

ellehcim 2 / 7  
Jan 1, 2013   #2
Great start, but I think it could use a little bit more elaboration on the musical's personal significance to you. Maybe elaborate, if you have seen more musicals, participated in them, etc.
sillybandz 6 / 20  
Jan 1, 2013   #3
"As I sat in my seat, I thought to myself, "This is going to be so boring." "----> I thought to myself, this is going to... (no quotations needed)

If you want to use dialogue than you must make sure you indent to new paragraph each time. So you need to indent "The twenty-fifth anniversary production of 'The Phantom of the Opera' is one of the best I have ever seen, and I'm sure you all will love it just as much as I do." He said. and also it is "... much as I do," he said

Idea is good.

help with why columbia?
holashelly 1 / 12  
Jan 1, 2013   #4
Great start. Explain more on why this experience was significant to you.
Karen94 - / 2  
Jan 1, 2013   #5
Since the essay allows only 1500 characters, it's easier to get carried away in the beginning but you could implement a lot more things about why it is actually significant to you


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