Hello! I finished writing my response to the first prompt for the UC applications, and I just wanted feedback on it on what to improve or change before I turn it in. I don't want it to go unedited before I submit it. Thanks to everyone who reads and replies, any help would be greatly appreciated!
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
I've always held the belief that one's environment and experiences affect the way they think, the way they act, and the qualities they hold, whether good or bad. The situations and events that one faces throughout their lifetime shapes who they are and what they eventually end up believing in. Should one's environment change, it is also likely that their thoughts will as well - a change of heart.
Throughout my childhood, I have always been told by my parents and relatives not to take advantage of what I have here and to consider myself "lucky" because I never had to grow up like they did. I never had to walk to school barefoot. I never had to worry about not having enough food to eat, not having a roof to shelter myself. In reality, I complained about having to do my homework, needing to go to school, and other things that teens in America would normally take advantage of rather than prioritize.
It wasn't until I visited my home land, the Philippines, in August 2004 with my family. It wasn't until I saw first hand what life in a third-world country was like, where having a working toilet was considered a luxury. It wasn't until I was told my parent's childhood stories of hard work and determination that I realized how much better off I really am here in America and how grateful I should be for my parents working so hard to raise me, as well as my older brother, up this way.
Many of my peers can relate because their parents have immigrated from their home countries as well and went through many hardships within their lives. Consequently, they understand and wish to work harder because of it so as not to have their parent's work go to waste. Growing up in a diverse community where the majority was Asian, I am a victim of the stereotype that I need to do well and get straight A's in order to go to a good college.
At first, I did not worry too much about my future and lived as each day came, but as I was able to grow and mature, I slowly realized that I should work for the same goals for the sake of my own children in the future. Although my progression from lazy and lacking confidence to determined and ambitious took longer than it should, I'm now prepared for the path ahead of me because of the world that helped shape who I am now. With the help of my parents, my community, and my peers, I have been taught the optimism, ambition, and patience needed in order for me to pursue my life ahead of me.
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
I've always held the belief that one's environment and experiences affect the way they think, the way they act, and the qualities they hold, whether good or bad. The situations and events that one faces throughout their lifetime shapes who they are and what they eventually end up believing in. Should one's environment change, it is also likely that their thoughts will as well - a change of heart.
Throughout my childhood, I have always been told by my parents and relatives not to take advantage of what I have here and to consider myself "lucky" because I never had to grow up like they did. I never had to walk to school barefoot. I never had to worry about not having enough food to eat, not having a roof to shelter myself. In reality, I complained about having to do my homework, needing to go to school, and other things that teens in America would normally take advantage of rather than prioritize.
It wasn't until I visited my home land, the Philippines, in August 2004 with my family. It wasn't until I saw first hand what life in a third-world country was like, where having a working toilet was considered a luxury. It wasn't until I was told my parent's childhood stories of hard work and determination that I realized how much better off I really am here in America and how grateful I should be for my parents working so hard to raise me, as well as my older brother, up this way.
Many of my peers can relate because their parents have immigrated from their home countries as well and went through many hardships within their lives. Consequently, they understand and wish to work harder because of it so as not to have their parent's work go to waste. Growing up in a diverse community where the majority was Asian, I am a victim of the stereotype that I need to do well and get straight A's in order to go to a good college.
At first, I did not worry too much about my future and lived as each day came, but as I was able to grow and mature, I slowly realized that I should work for the same goals for the sake of my own children in the future. Although my progression from lazy and lacking confidence to determined and ambitious took longer than it should, I'm now prepared for the path ahead of me because of the world that helped shape who I am now. With the help of my parents, my community, and my peers, I have been taught the optimism, ambition, and patience needed in order for me to pursue my life ahead of me.
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