hi! i decided to write my own common app prompt, and this is the rough rough rough draft of my essay in response to it. please give me your thoughts, opinions, and critiques! thanks! [554 words]
Q: How will the realization of your dreams create a lasting imprint on society?
A:
Ever since youth, I have struggled to understand how my physical bones, tissues, and organs fit together like fragmented puzzle pieces to create my living, thinking human body. Concealed by my physical exterior, an intangible self lies hidden within the brain - a mysterious, fascinating part of the body, yet far too complex for anyone to fully comprehend. It is the brain that has stirred an insatiable curiosity within me, for I am not defined by my carnal body, but by my internal thoughts and beliefs. Therefore, the study of neurology is truly the study of my own being and a gateway to limitless potential, for the field is only beginning to gain momentum. My dream is to study neurology so that I can uncover the secrets of how the brain functions, tackle intractable health concerns, and pioneer new branches of research, all of which would form lasting advances in society.
The derivation of this desire to pursue an education in neurology lies in the revolutionary idea that the brain is malleable and changeable, not a stagnant machine that cannot be mended. Indeed, the implications of this discovery could lead to the reversal of previously proclaimed permanent brain damage and the preservation of brain activity amongst the elderly population, two feats that neurologists have formerly deemed unfeasible. This belief has developed into a new branch of neurology known as neuroplasticity, and in this branch brains are fixing themselves, miracles are constantly occurring, and lives are drastically changing. I wish to work in this novel area of neurology because so little has been discovered about the plastic brain and so much is left to find; I wish to make my mark upon the world by researching and curing illnesses, not merely treating them in a conventional way.
So much of the medical field is centralized upon the extension of life, regardless of the mental or physical state of the patient. However, I believe that the quality of life is far more important than the prolongation of it, for how can a life be worthwhile if it cannot be enjoyed? Many patients are fed breath through tubes and kept alive through chemotherapy and surgeries, but are unable to accomplish the activities that make existence pleasurable and significant. Although technically alive, this external subsistence does not fulfill the internal needs of the patient, and therefore does not cure the patient of his illness. The research done by contemporary neuroplasticians, however, insists that the quality of life need not be forsaken in the act of rescuing a deteriorating body. The brain, just like any other organ, can be healed and strengthened through exercise, and I wish to help others regain the mental capacity they once had through a career in neuroplasticity.
The most alluring aspect of neuroplasticity is its focus not on salvaging a broken body, but on rejuvenating it and restoring it to the height it once was. Because of the work neuroplasticians are now achieving, lives can be revitalized through psychological and neurological therapy, and this chance to give new life to someone inspires me to enter the neurological field. Never before have people born with learning disorders been able to raise their IQs to normal levels; never before have people born blind had their vision restored; never before have stroke patients had their paralysis and cognitive deficits reversed. And yet, there is so much remaining to research and inquire, so many lives that could still be affected by advances in neuroplasticity. Thus, I could not imagine pursuing a more significant career path, for no other occupation affects society in such a direct and momentous way. I believe that no greater service could be done to humanity than to promote the general welfare of society both physically and mentally, and neuroplasticity has the potential to help people of all races, ages, and genders in this capacity.
Q: How will the realization of your dreams create a lasting imprint on society?
A:
Ever since youth, I have struggled to understand how my physical bones, tissues, and organs fit together like fragmented puzzle pieces to create my living, thinking human body. Concealed by my physical exterior, an intangible self lies hidden within the brain - a mysterious, fascinating part of the body, yet far too complex for anyone to fully comprehend. It is the brain that has stirred an insatiable curiosity within me, for I am not defined by my carnal body, but by my internal thoughts and beliefs. Therefore, the study of neurology is truly the study of my own being and a gateway to limitless potential, for the field is only beginning to gain momentum. My dream is to study neurology so that I can uncover the secrets of how the brain functions, tackle intractable health concerns, and pioneer new branches of research, all of which would form lasting advances in society.
The derivation of this desire to pursue an education in neurology lies in the revolutionary idea that the brain is malleable and changeable, not a stagnant machine that cannot be mended. Indeed, the implications of this discovery could lead to the reversal of previously proclaimed permanent brain damage and the preservation of brain activity amongst the elderly population, two feats that neurologists have formerly deemed unfeasible. This belief has developed into a new branch of neurology known as neuroplasticity, and in this branch brains are fixing themselves, miracles are constantly occurring, and lives are drastically changing. I wish to work in this novel area of neurology because so little has been discovered about the plastic brain and so much is left to find; I wish to make my mark upon the world by researching and curing illnesses, not merely treating them in a conventional way.
So much of the medical field is centralized upon the extension of life, regardless of the mental or physical state of the patient. However, I believe that the quality of life is far more important than the prolongation of it, for how can a life be worthwhile if it cannot be enjoyed? Many patients are fed breath through tubes and kept alive through chemotherapy and surgeries, but are unable to accomplish the activities that make existence pleasurable and significant. Although technically alive, this external subsistence does not fulfill the internal needs of the patient, and therefore does not cure the patient of his illness. The research done by contemporary neuroplasticians, however, insists that the quality of life need not be forsaken in the act of rescuing a deteriorating body. The brain, just like any other organ, can be healed and strengthened through exercise, and I wish to help others regain the mental capacity they once had through a career in neuroplasticity.
The most alluring aspect of neuroplasticity is its focus not on salvaging a broken body, but on rejuvenating it and restoring it to the height it once was. Because of the work neuroplasticians are now achieving, lives can be revitalized through psychological and neurological therapy, and this chance to give new life to someone inspires me to enter the neurological field. Never before have people born with learning disorders been able to raise their IQs to normal levels; never before have people born blind had their vision restored; never before have stroke patients had their paralysis and cognitive deficits reversed. And yet, there is so much remaining to research and inquire, so many lives that could still be affected by advances in neuroplasticity. Thus, I could not imagine pursuing a more significant career path, for no other occupation affects society in such a direct and momentous way. I believe that no greater service could be done to humanity than to promote the general welfare of society both physically and mentally, and neuroplasticity has the potential to help people of all races, ages, and genders in this capacity.