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Rhodes College Supplement Essay- 'Why Rhodes?' - my dream.



bilal530 2 / 7  
Jan 14, 2010   #1
WHY RHODES?

I dream about it. It is situated in Memphis- an ideal location to enjoy the more aesthetic pleasures of life with its riverboat tours, art galleries and ethnic restaurants. It is a relatively small 100 acre campus. But this small size allows for a small closely knit community, in a safe and secure setting-the perfect place for learning. The campus itself is a feast for the eyes. The buildings are all monumental pieces of gothic architecture- their graceful curves draped abundantly in intertwining ivy. These buildings are surrounded by finely manicured lawns and formal gardens. Aha! The Rollow Avenue of Oaks. It is a sublime sight to behold, particularly at sunset when the dark green leaves mingle with the red and orange, and the black silhouettes of the oaks stand against the setting sun. As night approaches, the bell chimes and the colored windows glow red, blue and green, adding an exotic touch to the picturesque surroundings. But this idyllic location and this scenic campus are only the beginning of my dream.

In my dream, I come across a large number of very talented and dedicated people. I meet Aaron Fitzgerald, president of the student government. He relates how Rhodes has helped him develop as a person and as a leader. Betsy Parkinson acknowledges how students are allowed to strike a balance between a rigorous academics and leisurely pursuits. She strives to excel in her organic chemistry course and simultaneously, organizes fun activities like the liquid nitrogen icecream party. I meet Sameer, a compatriot, who provides me with first hand observations about the Honor Code. These are the Faces of Rhodes. Joyful faces, with sparkling eyes- fully satisfied with the offerings of college. They are a diverse group of people from different backgrounds and culturesand yet they are one. The same unique traditions bring them together in their desire to excel, their willingness to take risks and their indomitable tenacity in the face of challenges. These students are a source of energy, the architects of campus life. They breathe life to this idyllic setting. They are the great artists, scientists and leaders of tomorrow. And in my dream, I am one of them....

The 'college experience' has me overwhelmed. I discuss philosophy and politics over drinks at the Burrow Refractory with people who will become an integral part of my future. I question widely held beliefs and try to develop my own perspective of things. My professors encourage me in this regard. These Professors- they are a dedicated group of people, who make learning truly an enjoyable experience. Some like Professor Birnbaum do this by organizing trips to Egypt. Others like Professor Loretta Jackson-Hayes make me comfortable in the lab. They are all very amiable and approachable. I am undecided about my academic major but this vibrant community of peers and professors helps me decide. On Fridays, I root for my basketball team in the Bryan Campus Life Centre. On Saturdays, I root for my science Project in Frazier Jelke Sceince centre Centre. On Sundays, I bond with my Sigma Nu Fraternity. And all this while, I prepare for mega events like the Rites of Spring Festival. Opportunities beckon. I decide to take up the Study Abroad Program and hone my skills in French at the University of Poitiers. I remain busy at all times, refusing to waste a single moment of the four most important years of my life.

a9961m 1 / 9  
Jan 15, 2010   #2
I've made several changes; please take a look and see if they're appropriate. Hope this helps!

It is a relatively small 100- acre campus. But this small size allows for a small closely knit close-knit community, in a safe ...

... are only the beginning of my dream.....

... and simultaneously, organizes fun activities like the liquid nitrogen ice- cream party.
... who provides me with first hand firsthand observations about the Honor Code. These are the F f aces of Rhodes.
... from different backgrounds and culturesand yet they are one.

And in my dream, I am one of them....

... and try to develop my own perspective of things(Is "things" the best word to use here?) .

These P p rofessors- they are a dedicated group ...

On Saturdays, I root for my science P p roject in Frazier Jelke Sceince centre Science Centre .
OP bilal530 2 / 7  
Jan 16, 2010   #3
Thank you! but I wasn't able to make these corrections. I had to send it off before I got this reply.
I'm really regretting the 'closely knit ' =close-knit part. But the rest I think are trivial errors that don't detract from the overall reading. And I'd really like to know what you guys think of the essay as a whole?
a9961m 1 / 9  
Jan 16, 2010   #4
I'm really regretting the 'closely knit ' =close-knit part. But the rest I think are trivial errors that don't detract from the overall reading.

Don't regret it; you're definitely right. My changes were only minute corrections. When I'm unsure of a word, I quickly check it through Merriam-Webster Online (m-w.com). Good luck for when decisions are released (4/1/2010) !


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