Prompt #2 - Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?
Many people have certain preconceived notions about Persians. They are rich, hairy, and understand Farsi. I am, for some reason none of these. I am not rich, hairy or fluent in Farsi, but I do speak Korean.
As a student in middle school I had many friends of Asian descent, so I wanted to learn Korean. When I reached high school, I enrolled into Korean 1AB. Towards the end of the school year my teacher informed me that there was a scholarship program I could apply to so I could go to Korea during the summer. I submitted an essay to the foundation of Koran Language and Culture in the USA. Out of all the applicants in the USA, I was one of the twenty-one that were chosen for the 2008 Summer Scholarship Program in Korea. While in Korea I excelled my knowledge of their culture and language. Being respectful and polite is a very important aspect that is highly expressed in their culture. I learned that they bow slightly when greeting or thanking someone. They also do not wear shoes in their homes so to be respectful you must always remove your shoes whenever you enter a home. In the Korean language there is also honorific forms in which you use to speak to anyone older than you to show respect. Learning and practicing such things allows me to be a better person and helps me to get farther in life.
I also applied for a university course at the University of Hawaii in Manoa. The selection process required an interview in Korean. Although I was anxious about the interview, the interviewer said I did exceptionally well for a Persian American. While in the program I learned a great number of new vocabulary words, how to properly pronounce certain difficult words and to converse fluently. That class was somewhat difficult because I was the only non Korean student while the rest of the student were Korean, so when the teacher talked I couldn't fully comprehend where as everyone else did. I had to work hours on end to read, translate, understand and complete the homework so I could be at the same level as everyone else in the class. Those six weeks might have been some of the hardest but they were most rewarding as I learned an advanced myself in communicating better in Korean.
These experiences of being chosen to learn more about a culture and language first hand have in themselves been very exhilarating, especially for me. I have studied a language that is very unique from all the others offered in my school like Spanish and French. I did not have the advantage of my parents speaking the language like some of the other students in the Spanish and French classes. I had accomplished these experiences solely through my own self determination which has made me more confident and well mannered. My persistence to learn a language that is considered one of the hardest to learn coupled with my resilience to continue despite obstacles in pronunciation has become a catalyst in bettering myself through how I present myself and in how I grasp any knowledge that comes towards me. These experiences make me proud to be the person that I am.
Nice essays. Only found one typo in the first essay:
People in life always strive to find their oneown purpose
ok thanks!
"They are rich, hairy, and understand Farsi. I am, for some reason none of these. I am not rich, hairy or fluent in Farsi, but I do speak Korean."
You can break it down by writing:
"They are rich, hairy, and Farsi. However, I am none of these and do speak Korean"
because I was the only non- Korean student
self- determination
These experiences of being chosen to learn more about a culture and language first hand have in themselves been very exhilarating, especially for me .
I think you can leave out the "especially for me", or put "to me" instead.
You mention in your second paragraph that learning Korea's honorous ways have helped you get farther in life, but you should elaborate how it did. Give an example or two on a previous example :P
Pretty unique! :) I enjoyed it, and best of luck!
PS. Yeah Korean is tough to learn, I'm still in the process and I'm korean ^_^;
Oh also, could you possibly have a look at recent essay, "I walk by faith"? I don't want to sound needy, but my deadline is rather soon ^_^; Thanks!
I am persian, and I had a good laugh at the first sentence. Well done. I like it, it is very interesting.
But i feel like you can expand on the idea of why you learned it more because to me that would be a very interesting thing to know about you.
Your last sentence is very eloquent, but it is a change in tone from the rest of the essay so i would suggest revising it a little so that it can flow better.
Your grammar is good, just read it over once or twice and i'm sure you will be able make it admission worthy.
Good Luck! :]
