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'The smell of the fresh new built houses'; Describe your academic interests



gege 1 / -  
Oct 9, 2012   #1
The smell of the fresh new built houses is what brings a smile to my face. I have always been interested in getting the best knowledge to be one of the top engineers in the community. My passion towards studying math and physics is going to help me in the major of civil engineer which I'm willing to apply for. Therefore, being involved in studying and working in something you have passion and love towards it will lead to enjoyment and creativity. To build homes that can assure highest levels of quality, safety, and a beautiful design is what I'm aiming for to accomplish in the future. The great source of knowledge that I will get from the well experienced professors will absolutely benefit me during the studies and after the studies as well. Therefore, through studying at Viterbi School Of Engineering I will be able to get the confidence in applying the knowledge I will get from it and I will be able to reach and accomplish my goals in the future.

Phoebe Africa 3 / 36  
Nov 2, 2012   #2
I like it. You thoroughly discuss your passion and why you so passionate about it.
However,I feel that the issue of HOW you intending on pursuing it (either than studying it) has not been addressed to the fullest. (I might just be crazy,hey) though I do think you can pay more attention to that point.

Just a few things;

"Willing to apply for" sounds like its being offered and you'll take because you can,not because you are eagerly driven to do so. I suggest sounding more "hungry" for it.

And "studying towards something YOU..." Cut the "you" and make it a "I". I think it'll be more personal in that way.

I hope I could help,though do get a second opinion,I'm not always sane,lol.

Please read my essay. Thanks!
humoresques 2 / 2  
Nov 5, 2012   #3
If I were an admissions officer, I'd want to know what your motivation/inspiration for engineering is, and go into more detail into it.


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