Penn asked us to introduce ourselves...here is my essay. Let me know if it's funny and effective or too ridiculous to submit.
My mother has a tattoo that reads "son." I am the life of parties I have never attended. Sharks have an entire week dedicated to me. My dance moves are so sharp they have been banned in over six different countries. Batman looks for my symbol when in distress. If I were to punch a man in the face, he would have to fight the strong urge to thank me. I am what many who matter consider, the most interesting man in the world. I am also a master of satire.
My mother has a tattoo that reads "son." I am the life of parties I have never attended. Sharks have an entire week dedicated to me. My dance moves are so sharp they have been banned in over six different countries. Batman looks for my symbol when in distress. If I were to punch a man in the face, he would have to fight the strong urge to thank me. I am what many who matter consider, the most interesting man in the world. I am also a master of satire.