Hey there people, ummm I'm pretty new at this. As in I just made an account five seconds ago, but I really could use a review on this essay. I kinda need help for the last conclusion sentence or whatever. Thank you so much! :D
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
The southern half of Guam is one of the most picturesque places on the island. With the slow, small village lifestyle, the beautiful beaches and lush, green hills, the south is the peaceful opposite of its big, bustling city counterparts. It is rich with ancient Chamorro history and culture, with a people that take pride in their heritage. But this clichéd, postcard paradise masks a broken society. Southern villages have the highest percentage of households below the poverty line. Southern schools have the highest drop-out rates on the island. They are most known for their habitual riots, high rates of teenage pregnancy and substance abuse. In sports, they are branded as dirty players and cheaters. The streets are littered with gangs. As Guam has one of the highest rates of suicide in the U.S., southern villages account for more than 50% of those numbers.
This is my home. Every part of my life is centered here - my school, church, family, friends, sports - everything. In the short sixteen years I have been a part of this community, I have lost a friend to suicide and I know handfuls that have attempted it. I have classmates that have been thrown in jail and are still awaiting court decisions. These are not just statistics to me. These are people. These are friends and family. Growing up in this community and having to face these harsh realities has greatly influenced my dreams of reaching out to people in need. I have witnessed the degradation, the abuse, and the neglect of my home. My vision is to see the restoration of it.
Recently, I went with my church youth group to visit a poor family in our neighborhood that was in need of some food and groceries. The referral paper from the mayor's office stated that there were 8 people residing in the house, 3 adults and 5 children. When we arrived, there must have been at least 13. Their small apartment barely contained them, and we ended up sitting under a small pop-up tent outside. All we planned was to deliver their care packages and leave, but that was not the case. We stayed for an hour and a half talking, singing, laughing, and playing with the kids. That satisfaction of making these unfortunate children smile, of listening to a mother cry as she hugged and thanked me, was unlike any other. I had help relieve someone's pain and suffering if even for a moment.
My dream to become an educator is rooted in my desire to reach out. I want to influence the next generation in my community to do better, to shoot for higher goals, to get rid of that wretched reputation that the southerners of Guam are poor low-lives, to overcome adversity, and realize that they can be more.
[insert awesome conclusion here]
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
The southern half of Guam is one of the most picturesque places on the island. With the slow, small village lifestyle, the beautiful beaches and lush, green hills, the south is the peaceful opposite of its big, bustling city counterparts. It is rich with ancient Chamorro history and culture, with a people that take pride in their heritage. But this clichéd, postcard paradise masks a broken society. Southern villages have the highest percentage of households below the poverty line. Southern schools have the highest drop-out rates on the island. They are most known for their habitual riots, high rates of teenage pregnancy and substance abuse. In sports, they are branded as dirty players and cheaters. The streets are littered with gangs. As Guam has one of the highest rates of suicide in the U.S., southern villages account for more than 50% of those numbers.
This is my home. Every part of my life is centered here - my school, church, family, friends, sports - everything. In the short sixteen years I have been a part of this community, I have lost a friend to suicide and I know handfuls that have attempted it. I have classmates that have been thrown in jail and are still awaiting court decisions. These are not just statistics to me. These are people. These are friends and family. Growing up in this community and having to face these harsh realities has greatly influenced my dreams of reaching out to people in need. I have witnessed the degradation, the abuse, and the neglect of my home. My vision is to see the restoration of it.
Recently, I went with my church youth group to visit a poor family in our neighborhood that was in need of some food and groceries. The referral paper from the mayor's office stated that there were 8 people residing in the house, 3 adults and 5 children. When we arrived, there must have been at least 13. Their small apartment barely contained them, and we ended up sitting under a small pop-up tent outside. All we planned was to deliver their care packages and leave, but that was not the case. We stayed for an hour and a half talking, singing, laughing, and playing with the kids. That satisfaction of making these unfortunate children smile, of listening to a mother cry as she hugged and thanked me, was unlike any other. I had help relieve someone's pain and suffering if even for a moment.
My dream to become an educator is rooted in my desire to reach out. I want to influence the next generation in my community to do better, to shoot for higher goals, to get rid of that wretched reputation that the southerners of Guam are poor low-lives, to overcome adversity, and realize that they can be more.
[insert awesome conclusion here]