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'Special Friends program' - Common App- Extracurricular Activity



kdelaney 3 / 2  
Oct 24, 2011   #1
Can someone help me? I'm not sure if I'm doing this right...

Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (1000 character maximum).

Special Friends is a program offered to elementary students in need of emotional support. Last year, this program connected me to a second grader named Anna. Once a week, we met after school, slowly developing a friendship. Although her mother has battled cancer, Anna shows no signs of weakness. Giggling, we often made up dances to her favorite Justin Bieber songs. Whether playing games or gushing over boys, our time together was always lighthearted. When asked if I would like to work with Anna again this year, I said yes without hesitation. Although I sought out to be a positive influence in her life, I feel as though our roles have reversed. Seeing such resilience in someone so young inspires me to stay strong.

coexistential 2 / 3  
Oct 24, 2011   #2
This is extremely well-put together and powerful but I think your intro could be made a little bit more interesting. The rest of the short answer is solid, but the intro is lacking in the voice that fills the rest of the response.


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