Hi everyone, thanks so much for taking the time to read my essay! I am applying as a transfer student to the Texas A&M University as an English major and Journalism minor.
HERE'S MY ESSAY:
I come from a long line of poets. My grandfather wrote for a newspaper stand during one of Pakistan's worst times of rioting, and convinced an entire army of rioters to put down their torches and use their words as a battleground. My father would write love letters to my mother from overseas, and kept her waiting for him every time he left for work. Pat Conroy said "I have read like a man on fire my whole life because the genius of English teachers touched me with the dazzling beauty of language." Truth be told, I could go on all day about famous quotes from prominent writers, poets and journalists. But these words stick out to me because of the raw truth in them, and because of how many of us can relate. Thanks to the magic of language and writing, we are able to live a million different lives of characters within books, live in different cities, and fall in love with different characters. The power of words can impale you, they can strike at your every emotion and turn you cold to your very core. Or they can lift you, release you, and when you use the right ones in the right order, they can tell your story without you even having to open your mouth. That's exactly what I've been doing all my life. I've been telling my story with my pen to my paper, in all the late night homework assignments I've done, in all the history essays, and all the emails to my overseas friends are a part of my story and how hard I've worked to become who I am.
I first realized my passion for writing when i won a contest in the third grade about "why my dad is the best dad in the whole world". It was displayed in our local newspaper and even though i was too shy to read it aloud in class, i was excited that my words had actually meant something to someone. i went on to place medals at the UIL competitions for my high school journalism class; the experience was exhilarating and fueled my desire to succeed. I even took dual credit English courses at my high school because it was my favorite subject. my passion for writing further ensued when my freshman class took a field trip to the Discovery green news network station. I had the honor of meeting the writers and news anchors for the show and saw the behind the scenes of media journalism. it was amazing how they brought their words to live on screen. that trip sparked my daydreams of writing for news stations or even becoming an english professor.
In my family the women are prim, proper, and immaculate to the outside eye, they fill the house with smells of my native country's food, and do exactly as they are told. Pursuing an education is not a priority for most of the people in my house, so trying to follow my dream of obtaining an education away from home was the most challenging obstacle of the year for me. When my family bound me to my local community college, i accepted my fate because that's what good traditional girls did. Out of respect for my parents wishes, i stayed close to home and abandoned my passion for writing. After class, I taught English to my neighbor's kids and helped them prepare for life in America. Watching them learn taught me that with perseverance and confidence, you can overcome any obstacle in your path. I started believing in myself more, and attended book club meetings at school so i could have a voice. I also took courses that i was not preeminent in, to teach me that the life i wanted would not be easily handed to me like an A. Reading helped me build up the courage to fight for the future i deserved. After many, many, long arguments with my family, I eased them into the idea that I would be going to a university to pursue a higher education, to earn my degree in a major that I was passionate about. I could name tons of reasons why Texas A&M University is the best place for me. I have never felt a stronger connection to a university, and immediately fell in love with the Aggie culture and sense of brotherhood that i've personally never felt before. the English department at TAMU presents a fresh range of courses and programs with a focus in literature and language, writing and reading, and culture and interpretation. i believe that the size, location, and reputation of TAMU would provide many more opportunities for me in the future. In my future at TAMU I can see myself eventually becoming a professor at the university teaching English, or writing and producing for a news network, and maybe even owning my own news station. I hope to be a person who can uncover facts and deliver truth and justice. i've never been so excited about my future before, and i am positive that i will have a remarkable one at TAMU because when thinking about the next three plus years of my college career, there isn't a time when I don't imagine myself spending those years at this great university. i look forward to joining in on the amazing English programs and groups TAMU offers such as the film studies working group, Brazos Valley Reads, and maybe even competing in the Gordone Awards competition. I've familiarized myself with the field of English and writing and i know that TAMU can help me achieve my long term goals.
I believe i am a strong leader with an innovative mind set, and my thirst for knowledge will make this world a better place by advocating for peace through education and journalism. Not many are brave (or foolish) enough to ever look their strict Pakistani mother in the eyes and tell her that you're unstoppable. Too many times had I let people make my decisions for me, and too many times had i accepted my so called fate. I never bothered fighting for myself until i realized my life would never be complete if i let others write my story for me. So here i am applying as an English major with a minor in journalism, in hopes that I can change people with my words as my grandfather did, and make an impression that people cannot ignore. I know that I dream big, because dreaming small has never gotten me anywhere. I will try, maybe fail, but never quit trying. Words are like magic tricks, they can make the most stubborn person see things that seemed so unreal a while ago. And a while ago, i never would have thought i would be able to apply to such a prestigious university. I have a lot to bring to the table, and my passion is one of my most innate qualities. In my circle of friends, you could say that i'm known as the unshakable one. After every fall i rise, after everyone says my efforts are futile, i rise higher, and after all that I've been through, i will not stop now.
I CAN TAKE ANY CRITICISM SO PLEASE DON'T HOLD BACK! :) Please let me know if its too long and what to cut out. I realize i haven't capitalized some things, i plant on editing all the grammar later. I'm more interested in your thoughts about the structure/pace/and flow. Should I add more or remove any unnecessary parts? Is it overall a good essay? Thanks SO much!
HERE'S MY ESSAY:
I come from a long line of poets. My grandfather wrote for a newspaper stand during one of Pakistan's worst times of rioting, and convinced an entire army of rioters to put down their torches and use their words as a battleground. My father would write love letters to my mother from overseas, and kept her waiting for him every time he left for work. Pat Conroy said "I have read like a man on fire my whole life because the genius of English teachers touched me with the dazzling beauty of language." Truth be told, I could go on all day about famous quotes from prominent writers, poets and journalists. But these words stick out to me because of the raw truth in them, and because of how many of us can relate. Thanks to the magic of language and writing, we are able to live a million different lives of characters within books, live in different cities, and fall in love with different characters. The power of words can impale you, they can strike at your every emotion and turn you cold to your very core. Or they can lift you, release you, and when you use the right ones in the right order, they can tell your story without you even having to open your mouth. That's exactly what I've been doing all my life. I've been telling my story with my pen to my paper, in all the late night homework assignments I've done, in all the history essays, and all the emails to my overseas friends are a part of my story and how hard I've worked to become who I am.
I first realized my passion for writing when i won a contest in the third grade about "why my dad is the best dad in the whole world". It was displayed in our local newspaper and even though i was too shy to read it aloud in class, i was excited that my words had actually meant something to someone. i went on to place medals at the UIL competitions for my high school journalism class; the experience was exhilarating and fueled my desire to succeed. I even took dual credit English courses at my high school because it was my favorite subject. my passion for writing further ensued when my freshman class took a field trip to the Discovery green news network station. I had the honor of meeting the writers and news anchors for the show and saw the behind the scenes of media journalism. it was amazing how they brought their words to live on screen. that trip sparked my daydreams of writing for news stations or even becoming an english professor.
In my family the women are prim, proper, and immaculate to the outside eye, they fill the house with smells of my native country's food, and do exactly as they are told. Pursuing an education is not a priority for most of the people in my house, so trying to follow my dream of obtaining an education away from home was the most challenging obstacle of the year for me. When my family bound me to my local community college, i accepted my fate because that's what good traditional girls did. Out of respect for my parents wishes, i stayed close to home and abandoned my passion for writing. After class, I taught English to my neighbor's kids and helped them prepare for life in America. Watching them learn taught me that with perseverance and confidence, you can overcome any obstacle in your path. I started believing in myself more, and attended book club meetings at school so i could have a voice. I also took courses that i was not preeminent in, to teach me that the life i wanted would not be easily handed to me like an A. Reading helped me build up the courage to fight for the future i deserved. After many, many, long arguments with my family, I eased them into the idea that I would be going to a university to pursue a higher education, to earn my degree in a major that I was passionate about. I could name tons of reasons why Texas A&M University is the best place for me. I have never felt a stronger connection to a university, and immediately fell in love with the Aggie culture and sense of brotherhood that i've personally never felt before. the English department at TAMU presents a fresh range of courses and programs with a focus in literature and language, writing and reading, and culture and interpretation. i believe that the size, location, and reputation of TAMU would provide many more opportunities for me in the future. In my future at TAMU I can see myself eventually becoming a professor at the university teaching English, or writing and producing for a news network, and maybe even owning my own news station. I hope to be a person who can uncover facts and deliver truth and justice. i've never been so excited about my future before, and i am positive that i will have a remarkable one at TAMU because when thinking about the next three plus years of my college career, there isn't a time when I don't imagine myself spending those years at this great university. i look forward to joining in on the amazing English programs and groups TAMU offers such as the film studies working group, Brazos Valley Reads, and maybe even competing in the Gordone Awards competition. I've familiarized myself with the field of English and writing and i know that TAMU can help me achieve my long term goals.
I believe i am a strong leader with an innovative mind set, and my thirst for knowledge will make this world a better place by advocating for peace through education and journalism. Not many are brave (or foolish) enough to ever look their strict Pakistani mother in the eyes and tell her that you're unstoppable. Too many times had I let people make my decisions for me, and too many times had i accepted my so called fate. I never bothered fighting for myself until i realized my life would never be complete if i let others write my story for me. So here i am applying as an English major with a minor in journalism, in hopes that I can change people with my words as my grandfather did, and make an impression that people cannot ignore. I know that I dream big, because dreaming small has never gotten me anywhere. I will try, maybe fail, but never quit trying. Words are like magic tricks, they can make the most stubborn person see things that seemed so unreal a while ago. And a while ago, i never would have thought i would be able to apply to such a prestigious university. I have a lot to bring to the table, and my passion is one of my most innate qualities. In my circle of friends, you could say that i'm known as the unshakable one. After every fall i rise, after everyone says my efforts are futile, i rise higher, and after all that I've been through, i will not stop now.
I CAN TAKE ANY CRITICISM SO PLEASE DON'T HOLD BACK! :) Please let me know if its too long and what to cut out. I realize i haven't capitalized some things, i plant on editing all the grammar later. I'm more interested in your thoughts about the structure/pace/and flow. Should I add more or remove any unnecessary parts? Is it overall a good essay? Thanks SO much!