It always amazes me how we interact with the nature and with each other, forming a giant network. From this simple truth, we have created a quite complicated interactive system, and by studying economics, I will be able to analyze this system and seek for the(I would remove "the" because then it implies that there are only a few ways. By removing it, it then opens up the situation to an infinite many ways.) ways to improve efficiency and equality.
Your first sentence includes nature. I'm not sure how nature is supposed to related with economics. I would change your first sentence... maybe something with the economy? Wall St.? stocks?
We live in a three dimensional world with three dimensional problems; they are multidisciplinary in nature. Though I want to major in economics, I know that economics alone will not provide sufficient answers to the challenges we are facing. Therefore, during my undergraduate years,(I think this is not needed since you are applying for undergraduate admission and therefore it's implied.) I want to acquaint myself with various disciplines that will help me analyze the economy from various perspectives such as psychology, sociology, and history. I am strongly confident that my education and experience under the Brown Curriculum will prepare me to tackle the real life problems and to maximize my potential; I would like to explore the ocean of knowledge in a spirit of free inquiry at Brown University.
I like this one. Sounds great! Good luck! It'd be nice if you revised mine too :)
