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UPenn: A Bold Choice (Why UPenn?)



randomzm 10 / 20  
Dec 28, 2008   #1
PROMPT: Describe the courses of study and the unique characteristics of the University of Pennsylvania that most interest you. Why do these interests make you a good match for Penn?

I first encountered the University of Pennsylvania at the Exploring College Options consortium in Jacksonville. To be completely honest, I attended the program mainly to learn more about Georgetown and Harvard, and I had little knowledge of Penn's strong academics or its focus on undergraduates. After the presentations, however, I found myself hovering around the Pennsylvania representative, eagerly eavesdropping on other students' questions and their responses. When the crowd finally dissipated and my turn came, I was very impressed by the representative's enthusiasm for the University and what it could do for me. From that moment forward, the University of Pennsylvania has been number one on my list.

One of my top concerns about college has been the prospect of narrowing down my diverse interests to a single major. The thought of double majoring and possibly minoring in order to fully pursue all of my academic interests is exciting, but also daunting. That's why I fell in love with Penn's Philosophy, Politics, and Economics program. With courses like "Behavioral Economics and Psychology" and "The Political Economy of Mass Media," I will be able to study all of the topics I have a passion for without having to fret over their not counting toward my major. The program has the flexibility I desire to allow me to study overseas or to shift my academic focus amongst the three disciplines without having to change my major, yet it also provides the structure I need to remain focused on my academic goals. The PPE major's interdisciplinary nature will also give me a large pool of teacher and resources from which I can draw upon for my thesis. All in all, it's as if Penn made the program just for me.

Two other considerations of mine in my college search have been location and culture. I remember living in Pennsylvania when I was in kindergarten, and the memories of the chill winters and temperate summers remain with me to this day. Now, after having lived in Florida for eleven years, I am looking for not only more variety in climate, but also exposure to new locations, new ideas, and a new culture. This is the primary reason why I am applying to out-of-state universities: there are just too many new experiences out there for me to remain in one place. The idea of leaving class and meeting some friends for a cheese steak in front of Independence Hall is inspiring, and a diverse campus like UPenn's in the center of one of the country's most cultural cities is just what I am looking for.

The final characteristic I have included in my college search is community. Like most other students, I am going to be a long way from home, and while I look forward to the challenges that my independence will bring, I would also like to know that the school I attend has a history of reaching out and providing everyone with opportunities to get involved in the school and the community. UPenn traditions, such as the "throwing of the toast" and Hey Day, exemplify the loose and approachable atmosphere that I have been searching for. The broad intramural sports programs will also give me chances to form relationships through a game of Ultimate Frisbee or flag football.

Poet and Penn graduate Ezra Pound once wrote, "When you cannot make up your mind which of two evenly balanced courses of action you should take - choose the bolder." It would certainly be easy for me to stay in Florida and pursue a normal degree in a normal college, but I want to make a bold choice. I want to attend the University of Pennsylvania.

amy 5 / 39  
Dec 28, 2008   #2
Great essay. Maybe you should mention some of the historical landmarks near Penn in the paragraph that discusses location and culture. Mentioning the Penn traditions was also brilliant. Overall, great essay. I, too, am applying to Penn. I hope we both get in. =)
surfsandiego 3 / 14  
Dec 28, 2008   #3
Good stuff. I would change the intro a bit though and not mention Gtown and Harvard in the first sentence. The end paragraph is excellent.
OP randomzm 10 / 20  
Dec 28, 2008   #4
thanks both of you for the advice

any other suggestions? *cough, Kevin, cough*
Angela629 9 / 86  
Dec 28, 2008   #5
well, it doesn't have to be kevin to correct this, does he? you know that he's very busy, every one wants help from him, but we contributors are also here for your writings, don't forget that.

Your overall structure is well done, but there are some bad word and sentence choices. here,:

I was very impressed by the representative's enthusiasm for the University and (you can use how it can change my future instead of)what it could do for me.

One of my top concerns applying to college is the prospect of narrowing down my diverse interests to a single major.

"All in all, it's as if Penn made the program just for me." should be replaced by "It seems like Penn designed those programs just for me."

Hope these helps,
Angela


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