HI !! i would appreciate it of you guys could read my short answer essay for the common app. read, critique, comment on the structure and my mistakes. feel free to change t up a bit. thanks!! this means a lot
Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (1000 character maximum).
Every Thursday you could find me at the Long Island Jewish Hospital volunteering in the Neonatal Intensive care unit. The NICU is a special place to me because it where babies who are extremely sick can get a second chance at life and every child deserves that. My day consists of charting the patient's vitals and medications that would be useful to the doctors and nurses. Volunteering brings a wave of satisfaction over me because I know that I have had a part in making a child better. There are days when you encounter critical and grave situations involving the babies. During these times you need a lot of strength to cope with it. Life is precious and every second is a gift, for tomorrow isn't guaranteed. From being around the babies in the NICU I learned that to live is to fight and even though we may not win the fight, its all about our willingness to succeed. I will take this experience into nursing school so that I can help people like the babies in the NICU; get a second chance at life.
its needs a lot of work so your comments would be very helpful. Thanks :)
Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (1000 character maximum).
Every Thursday you could find me at the Long Island Jewish Hospital volunteering in the Neonatal Intensive care unit. The NICU is a special place to me because it where babies who are extremely sick can get a second chance at life and every child deserves that. My day consists of charting the patient's vitals and medications that would be useful to the doctors and nurses. Volunteering brings a wave of satisfaction over me because I know that I have had a part in making a child better. There are days when you encounter critical and grave situations involving the babies. During these times you need a lot of strength to cope with it. Life is precious and every second is a gift, for tomorrow isn't guaranteed. From being around the babies in the NICU I learned that to live is to fight and even though we may not win the fight, its all about our willingness to succeed. I will take this experience into nursing school so that I can help people like the babies in the NICU; get a second chance at life.
its needs a lot of work so your comments would be very helpful. Thanks :)