'wanted to be a mechanical engineer' - Stanford - Intellectual Vitality

Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development.

Since the age of four, I've wanted to be a mechanical engineer. I've always wanted to know the ins and outs of cars, the way they operate, what makes this vehicle better than the next. Since then it has been a process; a compilation of steps focused towards reaching that goal. At age 11, I was given a drawing table just so I could sketch and design vehicles that l liked as well as abstract cars. It gave me the opportunity to look at and try out different exteriors of different vehicles. But I couldn't stop at the drawing table. I had to go out and see these cars for myself. My dad would take me to the Dallas Auto Show every time it came to town. Here, I was able to see and analyze the specifications of each vehicle and see what makes each car unique. During June 2011, I attended a program entitled Operation Catapult at Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology. I am highly grateful for the opportunity of attending this program for my experience was one I could take and utilize towards my goal and throughout my life. It gave me the chance to collaborate with fellow engineers and to be hands-on and interactive with my project; an opportunity I would have never thought of having. This program led me to choose my senior thesis topic concerning the utilization of algae-based bio-fuels in cars. I was curious as to what can I do in order to make a transition from the use of gas in vehicles to alternative fuels such as algae. I am currently researching this topic and at every corner I am learning something new about cars and how they operate and how they must be altered in order to make that shift. Engineering is like a jigsaw puzzle where I have to try multiple pieces multiple ways until that unified, cohesive picture comes together. This will help me grasp and cope with the trial-and-error process of engineering which will ultimately enhance my intellectual development now and throughout my career.

What do you think?
Grammatical errors?
Anything I need to change?

Please and Thank you! (in advance)

At age 11, I was given a drawing table just so I could sketch and design vehicles that l liked, as well as abstract cars.

Here, I was able to see and analyze the specifications of each vehicle and see what made each car unique.

During June 2011, I attended a program called Operation Catapult, at Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology.

I am highly grateful for the opportunity of attending this program, for my experience was one I could take and utilize towards my goal and throughout my life.

It gave me the chance to collaborate with fellow engineers and to be hands-on and interactive with my project; an opportunity I would never have thought of having.

I was curious as to what I could do in order to make a transition from the use of gas in vehicles to alternative fuels such as algae.

Engineering is like a jigsaw puzzle where I have to try multiple pieces multiple ways until that unified, cohesive picture comes together.---Great sentence!

This is a well written and well thought out essay. Good luck in school and have fun!

:)