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west meets south; Common app - Experience


ellehcim 2 / 7  
Jan 1, 2013   #1
would greatly appreciate feedback on this essay, thanks so much!

Prompt: A range of academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences adds much to the educational mix. Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity in a college community, or an encounter that demonstrated the importance of diversity to you.

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Two summers ago my youth group went on a trip to Clovis, California with an organization called World Changers, which provides free construction work for families that would otherwise not be able to afford house improvements. Though Clovis is only a three-hour drive from my church's location in San Jose, we soon found that people had come from all over the country to help out. This was a marked difference from my last World Changers trip, where everyone involved was a Californian. Upon arrival in Clovis, I was surprised to discover that the majority of my crewmates, whom I would be working with the whole week, were from Alabama. My proud Californian self was anxious about working with the Southerners. Sure, I knew about a few different cultures, from my friends at home, but I held the stereotype that Southerners didn't have much "culture" at all. Would we end up discussing fried chicken, cow-tipping, and football all week?

Immediately, I did find that some of my preconceptions were true. My Alabaman crewmates all had thick Southern accents, loved country music, and were astounded when I told them I'd never been to a Chick-fil-a ("Are you serious? What kind of food do y'all even eat?"). As the week progressed, however, I found my narrow-minded self was completely wrong. Everyone on my crew was kind, considerate, and remained remarkably level-headed despite the long, hot work days. I found that I had much in common with all of my crewmates, and that my fear of being unable to relate to the rest of my crew was invalid. I bonded with my crewmates by sharing similar experiences from church, marching band, and general high school problems. Learning about fellow teens' experiences from all over the country was both entertaining and eye-opening. At the end of the week, the kids from my group ended up teaching taught the non-Californians a few Chinese phrases - and in return, we were given a brief history of Southern football.

Five months later and I still communicate regularly with my Southern friends, keep up to date on Alabama football, and listen to country music. Though I might not have imagined it, I'm very thankful for the experience to meet people from all parts of the country. In only one week, I had learned about another culture that I had always generalized but never bothered to understand. My experience in Clovis that summer taught me that having a passing knowledge of different cultures just doesn't cut it sometimes. Rather, getting to know the people who identify with a certain culture is the best lesson in diversity anyone can ask for. As I look to my future college experience, I am excited to meet even more people with diverse backgrounds, as well as sharing my personal experiences with them. Perhaps I'll even get to go to a Chick-fil-a one day.
OP ellehcim 2 / 7  
Jan 1, 2013   #2
bumping to top! please help!
ticklelisaelmo 8 / 42 3  
Jan 1, 2013   #3
At the end of the week, the kids from my group ended up teaching taught the non-Californians a few Chinese phrases - and in return, we were given a brief history of Southern football.

you mean taught right?
OP ellehcim 2 / 7  
Jan 1, 2013   #4
yes, sorry! Thank you for catching that!


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