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'to wonder how things work' - University of Pennsylvania Supplement



disaznboii19148 2 / 2  
Oct 17, 2011   #1
Hopes and Goals

----- Since my earliest childhood memories, my curiosity has always led me to wonder how things work. Whether it was a car or a kitchen appliance or a refrigerator, my interest always sparked when I observed the mystery of how machines operate. This is why I have decided to apply to the prestigious School of Engineering and Applied Sciences at the University of Pennsylvania. Discovering new things has always been important to me and, at the University of Pennsylvania, I hope to nurture my thirst for knowledge, learning new things about myself and the world around me.

----- Several of my close friends attend the University of Pennsylvania and I, too, hope to be a part of the unique atmosphere of Penn that makes it the amazing place it is. Culture is very important to me, and sharing cultures is no problem with the diversity boasted by Penn. I hope to learn new things from people of different cultures, backgrounds, and beliefs. Too often are communities segregated from other people because of minor differences. Without diversity and change, one cannot hope to gain new insight on the world. Understanding other cultures is very important to learning and contributing to a better world, free of prejudice.

----- I hope to not only gain new insights, but I also want to prove to others that I am a capable young man that will stop at nothing to succeed. I want to contribute to the diversity at the University of Pennsylvania by being informative to others of my Chinese heritage which includes its vast history and diverse culture. In addition, I also hope to introduce people to one of my favorite hobbies, dance. Dancing is a passion for me; it helps in forgetting the troubles of the day and to relax. Many people often see dancing on television and do not have a second thought about it, but I hope to show many of my future friends and classmates of the many benefits of dance. I believe that this will have significantly positive effect on the lives of many people as it did mine.

----- Learning is of vital importance to me, and at the School of Engineering and Applied Sciences, I hope to discover a new world viewed through the lens of modern technology and the wonders not known to the everyday person. With the excellent engineering school at penn, one day I myself may be contributing to society with machines that could very well make life easier for those who are burdened with the troubles of daily life. It is this sense of helping the average person that drives me to continue with my studies.

----- My parents would always tell me how harsh life was in poverty back in China. They would always say to me that they take care of me so that one day I can do the same for them. That is why I have always wanted to succeed in life and ever since I was a child, it was my dream to be a part of Penn's community. Penn serves a door which leads to a future where I can help my family and make society a better place at the same time.

admission2012 - / 475  
Oct 18, 2011   #2
Hello,

As many now know, I am a University of Penn graduate and I take pride in all things Penn. After reading your essay, I did not get a sense of why you truly wanted to attend Penn. Yes your friends go there, Yes Penn is a great school(which it already knows very well), and Yes some really cool things are developed there. What the admissions committee really wants to see is your desire for Penn. What specifically does Penn offer that will really make you as successful as you want to be? This essay needs a lot more work in order to be ready to compete on the level that Upenn demands. admissions essay advice


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