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"My world after joining American Cancer Society" - Personal Statement


wantamartini 1 / -  
Nov 28, 2010   #1
Describe the world you come from- for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

Is this good?

Many of us have differences in life and struggles that may come upon us once in awhile. Living in different environments , whether it is good or bad will always show some kind of struggle in their own lives, mainly ones who live in those harsh environments. Having been born in a middle class family with no brothers nor sisters has been yet pleasing but also dreadful. Yes I may get all the things I may ask for and yes it may be pleasing but there's more in life that has to offer. I have been grateful for my whole family and what they have all done for me, especially my aunt and my cousin, who had shaped my aspirations to continue on. These two loving souls have been there for me whenever I needed them, whether it's struggling in school or when I just needed to talk to someone. My dear cousin has been like a sister to me since 5. We both grew up close; having arguments here and there but after all those arguments she was still there. The one that had inspired me to keep continuing in school when I was on the brink of just giving up but she had given me the self-confidence that I thought I would never find. I have been let down by my own peers, dropping my confidence as if I had 100 pounds strapped to my feet pulling me to the bottom of the pool yet alone that's when she had stepped up. For all the years that she's been there for me, guiding me to the path that I had least expected and for that I thank you. One other person that belonged to same world as I and had also motivated me in life is my aunt. If it wasn't for her blood sweat and tears I would not be the person who I am today. Over the course of my high school years I have joined many clubs but one particular club that I have joined is American Cancer Society. Joining American Cancer Society was something that I had to do, wanting to help others who were suffering from breast cancer and to support it as well. The reason why I chose to join was my aunt who has been diagnosed a month ago and who is currently fighting for her life. And one day it will be my turn to take care of her as she had inspired me to become a pharmacist. Hoping that one day I shall develop a new type of cure for other cancers and as well as for breast cancer.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13,334 129  
Dec 3, 2010   #2
Living in a new different environment , whether it is good or bad, will always show

Hoping I hope that one day I shall develop a new type of cure for other cancers and as well as for breast cancer.---If you say this, you should prove your seriousness by writing a few sentences about the most recent advancements and innovations in cancer research. You'll have to read some article about it.

Use paragraphs! It's important to decide how many ideas you want to convey and use ONE PARAGRAPH FOR EACH IDEA. This essay should be at least three paragraphs. Make each paragraph start with a topic sentence.

(Google the words "paragraph" and "topic sentence")

:-)


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