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IELTS Task 2 - Agree or Disagree Essay - Railroad vs Roads



elinita123 2 / 2  
Nov 1, 2021   #1
Question:

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads.


To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?


It is argued that government should invest more money on the railway system instead of roads. From my point of view, I strongly agree with this idea because railways bring enormous benefits to our lives.

To begin with, the development of the railroad system will facilitate long distance travel and the transportation of bulk goods with speed and certainty. Railways can be seen as one of the fastest modes of transport second only to airways. Trains can reach a speed of more than 300 km/h and they have an extremely large carrying capacity compared to other vehicles such as cars, motorbikes or airplanes. Therefore, railway transport is the perfect choice for traffic, especially long distance travel with heavy loads of goods.

In addition, the railway network also makes a great contribution to the protection of the environment. We know that CO2 emissions from vehicles are the primary driver of global climate change and air pollution. Hence, improving rail routes is an effective way to encourage public switching from private vehicles to more eco-friendly ones like trains or trams. The more people travel by railways, the less toxic gases are generated and emitted to our environment.

In conclusion, government should consider spending more money on developing the railway network than constructing roads. Railway is not only an effective solution for environmental problems but it also makes our traveling activities easier and more convenient.

Please leave some feedback on my essay. Many thanks

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15385  
Nov 2, 2021   #2
Excellent restatement and an equally admirable thesis response. This is a strong response foundation and the TA score will reflect that. I have to admit that even the reasoning paragraphs are well thought out. The writer clearly understood the topic and discussion format requirements. The ideas presented are clear and tremendously relevant to the essay. This piece of writing shows that the writer has the potential to score as high as an 8 or 9. The writer has that ability, but it was underutilized in this presentation.

The writer has only 232 words in this presentation. Not writing 250 words, the writer forced score markdown based on wordcount instead. Further explanation development in every paragraph would have prevented that. Instead of a passing score, the writer may fail instead.
iam5102 2 / 5  
Nov 5, 2021   #3
Your essay is well put, but I think you should explain more specifically in each paragraph in order to have 250 or more words. In general, your essay is excellent!


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