IELTS Writing Task 1 - Changes In The World Population Between 1900 and 2000

The pie charts illustrate changes in the proportion of world population according to the regions in 1900 and 2000. Overall, it can be seen that the most significant change happened in Europe, while the least or no changes at all happened in North America and Others during a century.

First of all, in 1900 the population of Europe including Russia was a quarter of the total and it decreased dramatically 11% in the next 10 years. In the same year, Asia was the biggest population among the regions with the proportion of 60%, decreased to the level of 54% which was including the region of former Soviet Asia in year 2000. The new region added in the data in 2000, Middle East and North Africa, stated at 6%. As for Africa alone, there was a significant increase from 4% to 10%, similarly it happened in Latin America from 3% to 8% during the period, as addition there was Caribbean included in the Latin America region in year 2000. Finally, there were two regions left that virtually did not show any changes, those were North America and Others that stayed at 5% and 3% respectively.

As the conclusion, the majority changes during the period of 1900 to 2000 were in Europe, Asia, Africa, and Latin America. While the least or no changes were in North America and others, and the rest was additional region.

===Please help me to correct grammatical errors and comment the contents of my essay also give suggestion! Thanks! XOXO===

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- As for Africa alone, there was a significant increase from 4% to 10%, similarly itsimilar happened in Latin America from

3% to 8% during the period, asin addition there wasis Caribbean included in the Latin America

region in year 2000.

- As the conclusion, the majority of the changes during the period of 1900 to 2000 were in Europe, Asia, Africa, and Latin America.

Well, Hetty, aside from the minor fix I did as stated above, you analysis is great. You were able to put your analysis in place and it absolutely help

that you keep your numbers in figures when describing the result of your analysis.

A note from me, PROOF READ your analysis before submitting it so you can have a final read.

Keep writing

Cheers!!!

Hi, @hettymsk

The pie charts illustrate changes ininformation regarding the proportion of world population according to the regions inbetween 1900 and 2000. Overall, it can be seen that the most significant change happened in Europe, while the least or no changes at all happened in North America and o thers during a centuryover the timeframe .

Helllllooo Hetty, a few points;
Para 1:
- Here do you need to write a 2-sentence overview. By doing so, this will improve your score in TA (check IELTS band descriptor). Also, if you could, then write intro and overview in a different paragraph. A closer look at my sample;

Overall, the most striking point is that population growth in the world increases significantly. In any case, Asian is the world's largest population. Yet, its growth experiences a dramatic decrease.

Para 2:
I strongly suggest breaking this into several paragraph as to reach coherence.
- first of all, finally (DELETE). you dont need to use sequencers here. Save them for a process.
- sentence 1, the next 10 years (DELETE) write the next 100 years.
- Rewrite sentence 2, as it brings run-on sentences. Here is my sample;
Initially, the population of Asia was listed in 60%. Yet, this percentage decreased slightly to 54% (with former Soviet Asia) in 2000, an incline of 6% in 100 years.
- Sentence 3 needs rewording as it has bad flow. My sample; Interestingly, both Middle East and North Africa broke a record as current world population in 2000, dominating 6% of total population.

- it takes some time to understand both sentence 4 and 5. Now, it's your turn. I'll check your grammar after your rewrite those sentences.

Para 3:
You don't need to write a conclusion in task 1 since this has been replaced with an overview. Overview is more important here. For more details, read IELTS band descriptor writing task 1.

Thanks, eddy suaib