IELTS: Children always follow their parents rules and techniques to save money for future planning

Most Parents think they should teach their children about money; Why it is important to teach about money? What is the best method to teach children about money?

Answer:

I do agree that, in this modern and glamour world, where money has too much value against other things. In a such modern society parents much have to think, how to teach their children about money saving techniques and usage of money.

In old era, where people had no life standards and commercial values, so people were unaware about the latest items and other things. Due to low education, limited business and many more other reasons, people were feeling about the life standards and people were not traveling to other parts of world. In fact people were slave to their empire, they fallowed their orders, they had not thinking about their life and just obey the orders.

On the other hand, people have common sense and feelings in modern era due to education and globalization. Now every one is free and want looks good from others in there nighbours, offices and even in their families. Education and technologies have played ample value in commercial world.

Due to globalization, people are migrating to all over the world, where people find the new ways of life standards.

In modern expensive world, every one required money for upgrade life style, even children feeling are different from old era, education provided sense to every one including man, woman and children, all are want to look good with state of art facilities like, fashions, electronic mobile , watch, shoes, clothes and much more other accessories. There is too much compitation between families, students , office colleagues and even in nations. So money is main source of income, without money , we can not do anything in this fashionable and globalized world. Money is necessary at every stage of life, therefore it is the most responsibility of all parents , they must teach the children to save money for future and urgent requirements. There are too many methods about money saving techniques, but in modern society , their is banks every where in the world , who are serving to every one, their should be children accounts , where children save extra money from the pocket money and also parents save money in the name of children for future study and other purpose.

In my conclusions, children always fallow the parents rules and money techniques to save money for difficult situation and future planning. So children could be most beneficial to the society in their family life.

modern society parents much have to think, how to teach their children about money saving techniques and usage of money.
delete much

so people were unaware about the latest items
delete so people

Due to low education, limited business and many more other reasons, people were feeling about the life standards and people were not traveling to other parts of world.

Due to low education, limited business and other reasons, people thought that life standards were difficult as well as traveling to other parts of the world.

In fact people were slave to their empire, they fallowed their orders, they had not thinking about their life and just obey the orders.
In fact people were slaves to their empires, followed their orders but did not think about their life at all.

I only had time to read some of it but hope this helps.
Re read it and look carefully for errors because I found many, especially in wording the sentence and misspelling.

Do not begin your essay with expressing your opinion assuming the reader has an adequate knowledge about the issue you are going to discuss. The introduction is for you to introduce your topic to the reader and therefore you should first introduce the background of the issue to him. Then express your view.... That's a better arrangement and the reader would be more convinced about your point when you present your intro that way :)

I'd like to add my voice to this discussion by offering some advice as well :-) I believe that you could start off this essay by introducing how money is viewed by the financially privileged children of today, which is as an electronic currency. So the money does not seem real to them. They use atm cards, money cards, and credit cards to pay for their needs with their parents constantly keeping their money sources filled with their allowances. So the children have a different sense of what money is and how to use it. They see money as something magical that just appears to them. End the introduction by saying that, because of those reasons, parents need to teach children about money, it's value, why they have to save it, and how to save it.

Your succeeding paragraphs can concentrate on building up the evidence to support the reasons you previously stated. Remember to always indicate a personal opinion or experience relating to the reason you are discussing so that you are continuously voicing your personal opinion on the matter also. Finally, you can close the essay by restating the prompt and repeating your stance on the topic. The stance that you agree that parents should teach their children about the meaning, value, and importance of saving money.