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Coca Cola's sales numbers - Task 1 IELTs (pie)



Vns9x 102 / 230  
Jan 29, 2015   #1
The pie chart illustrates the cosmopolitan distribution of Coca Cola's sales in the year of 2000 and the graph shows Coca Cola's share price in dollars from 1996 to 2001.

According to the pie chart of 2000, the total Coca Cola's sales number is 17.1 billion dollars. The product was the most desirable in North America since it occupies 30.4 percent of the pie chart. The following continents are Latin America and Europe which purchases 25,7 percent and 20,5 percent out of the Coca Cola's total revenue respectively. The last 2 continents are the modest consumers, Africa and Middle East, both have comparatively low percentage, specifically, 16,4 and 7,0.

There is a huge fluctuation when it comes Coca Cola's share price from 1996 to 2001. At the beginning, which is 1996, the share price was roughly 35 dollars. After that from 1996 to 1997, the price drastically increased to almost 70 dollars. Notwithstanding, the share price could not stabilize to mid-1997, it dropped to 60 dollars and then all of a sudden the price immensely rose from the mid-1997 to 1998 to approximately 85 dollars. From that point to 2001, the share price kept declining until 2000 , however it rose insignificantly from 2000 to mid-2000 compared to its best share price which is 85 dollars.

Any comments are welcome!


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myngoc311 5 / 18  
Jan 29, 2015   #2
Your essay is very good for task 1 IELTS but I still have some comments following

The following continents are Latin America and Europe which purchases 25,7 percent and 20,5 percent out of the Coca Cola's total revenue respectively.

I believe you can not say "purchase revenue". I suggest to replace purchases by accounts for.

Notwithstanding, the share price could not stabilize to mid-1997, it dropped to 60 dollars and then all of a sudden the price immensely rose from the mid-1997 to 1998 to approximately 85 dollars.

For the second graph, you wrote a lot "from...to...," therefore, for this sentence I suggest you to write "...all of a sudden the price immensely rose to approximately 85 dollars in 1998."

From that point to 2001, the share price kept declining until 2000 , however it rose insignificantly from 2000 to mid-2000 compared to its best share price which is 85 dollars.

In IELTS, compound nouns are very preferable. Therefore, I want to place a compound noun in the above sentence. "... until 2000, with an insignificant rise to 65 dollars in mid-2000"


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