Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


Writing Task 2 IELTS - conflicts about deciding subjects at university



TinhAnhNguyen 1 / -  
Jun 16, 2021   #1
Hopefully examiners will give out the band of this essay and the mistake

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like.


Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology


In spite of the fact that we are currently living in a developed society, there are still some considerable conflicts about deciding subjects at university. Some people advocate that students should study the subject they are in love with. Others opine that they should be spurred to learn utilitarian curriculums such as science, technology and so on. I fully consent on the first idea, in contrast I oppose such notion of the second one and both of these views will be outlined in this essay

On the one hand, there are unanimous agreement on self-choosing subject and I totally agree. All occupations are useful to social life, and they require intensive effort. Therefore, under no circumstances are student going to put effort in acquiring knowledge that they are not interested in. Should a student be forced to learn a subject they dislike, they soon get mundane and lost motivation to continue to learn type of subject. In addition, many prestigious youtubers actually drop out school early due to the dullness of the subject they have to learn in university and surprisingly turn out to be successful. They didn't scale the height via learning and they still make a considerable outcome.

On the other hand, some expresser opine that it is essential to fully motivate and encourage student to take utilitarian and advanced curriculum like science, biology and so on. There are no doubt in the usefulness of these subject in the long run. However, as the matter of fact, this statement is only true when the students are interested in it. Vietnamese education in university is a great example for this phenomenon. They invariably have to learn all of of these subject without any resistance, and all of the knowledge acquired are not in use later on in their daily life. Therefore these subject should not only be allowed in university, despite the significant of these kinds of subject in the future.

In conclusion, It is more substantial for students to freely chose their curriculum they are passionate about, and although rocket science subjects like technology is considerably imperative in the long run, they should not be compulsory at all. They are useful, however it will be a waste of time and effort if the learners do not have the will to be receptive of them

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15475  
Jun 17, 2021   #2
The validity of the personal opinion you present should be in the 3rd paragraph of the essay. It is based on a presentation or analysis of the public reasons supporting each of the public academic study preferences. That means, you have to first understand the validity of each public point of view which will then lend itself to the creation of your personal opinion. You cannot agree with a particular viewpoint from the onset because this is first and foremost, a comparative essay presentation.

The vocabulary usage in the essay is clear for the most port. There are some words that you seem to have made up though as these words are not part of the English vocabulary in any form (ex. expresser) Familiarize yourself with intermediate to advanced English vocabulary to help you avoid future vocabulary usage errors your presentation.


Home / Writing Feedback / Writing Task 2 IELTS - conflicts about deciding subjects at university
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳