Unanswered [4] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS Essay task 2 -Damage of the environment is an inevitable consequence of worldwide improvements



Emm23 1 / -  
Nov 4, 2015   #1
HI Everyone, I really need some help in my essay for the coming IELTS exam. I deeply appreciate all ur help and kindness. Thank You.

Topic: Damage of the environment is an inevitable consequence of worldwide improvements in the standard of living. Discuss.
Nowadays, environment damage is a controversial issue facing many nations around the world. Some people argued that the rise of the standard of living greatly causing environmental damage. Others contend that there is no relevance between environmental damage and the standard of living. This essay proposed a balanced approach.

The first thing about environmental damage is that it is a result of the rising standard of living among countries. This is due to the fast development, competition and the industrial activities which drive the needs for a higher quality, modern life. As a consequence, a vast area of lands are deforested, as well as higher consumption of fossil fuel that eventually leads to increased greenhouse gases and climate change. Therefore, the rise of the standard of living put a cost to our environment and thus, efforts should be taken to prevent it.

On the other hand, environmental damage is equally influenced by the negligence of the society itself. Protecting the environment no longer become their priorities due to the lack of awareness and indulgence in working lifestyle. People take less concern about their environmental responsibilities thus causing damage to their surroundings. For instance, smog release from industrial plants due to weak environmental policy and regulation.

In conclusion, while it is true that the damage of environment is a consequence of the standard of living, but it is also influenced by the society's own negligence. This issue if not treated properly could become serious and go to the extremes. Thus, the environment damage is a consequence of both human negligence and the standard of living.

justivy03 - / 2265  
Nov 7, 2015   #2
Emra, I'd like to share my thoughts on your essay.

-Nowadays, environmental damage is
- a controversial issue facing many nations around the world is facing .
- Some people argued that the rise of the standard of living greatly causingcaused environmental damage.
- Others contendargue that there is no

- The first thing about environmental damageFirst things first, this is that it is athe result
- Therefore, the rise of the standard ofmodern living put a cost to our environment and thus, efforts should be taken to prevent it.

- is a consequence of the standard of livingway we live , but it is also influenced by the society's own negligence.
- ThusTherefore , the environmental damage is a consequence
- of both human negligence and the standard of livingwhat we do and what we don't do towards keeping our environment's survival .

There you have it Emra, I wish my remarks helped, I do believe that you need to expand your vocabulary as you used very few words over and over through out the essay, make it a hobby to read, this helps you increase your vocabulary.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS Essay task 2 -Damage of the environment is an inevitable consequence of worldwide improvements
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳