IELTS: dangers derived from the use of chemicals in food production

Do the dangers derived from the use of chemicals in food production and preservation outweigh the advantages?
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Food is supplying energy for body which is containing carbohydrate and vitamin. All of people need food for their life because without food we can die. Several centuries ago, many people cook in their house for their family, so, they can eat natural food. However, since half to twenty century, many people have busy toward their job in a variety of company or in other places. As a result, they have not enough time for cooking, so, they begin to buy some food in a small shop or restaurant or sometimes they buy fast food for supplying energy for their body. As we know, in the fast food contain matter of chemical that is danger for our body. Therefore, I will explain danger derived from this food.

On the one hand, food that is containing matter of preservation. For example, noodle is a fast food that is liked by many people especially in Indonesia. Many people in here choose noodle as a favorite food if they hurry up for supplying their energy because this food is a fast food and we can find anywhere in Indonesia. They know that noodle contain matter of chemical such preservative (sodium benzoate) which is danger for their brain. That is why we always get headache each we eat this food.

On the other hand, food that is used flavoring like food in the restaurant. For example, I find some restaurants and small shop using flavor like "Ajinomoto". We know that "Ajinomoto" is a flavor for putting in a food, so, a taste food become delicious. In my opinion, I think that food is using "Ajinomoto" is not good for my brain because if I eat that, I become headache.

To sum up, I believe that fast food that is containing matter of chemical is not good for our brain because that becomes boomerang for our body to life future. I think we better cook in our house than buy in place random and we should avoid from fast food.

your introduction is too long, don't put any details here,

here, in introduction, you just need to paraphrase the task, then state your position, and try to catch the reader's attention

This intro is too lengthy and you will run into problems if you do not handle time for each section of your essay. Stick to hook, background and thesis statement. Otherwise you would be wasting time on intro unnecessarily.


What does this mean? Is it -
First, many chemicals are being used to preserve food for future consumption.
They know that noodle contain matter of chemical such preservative (sodium benzoate) which is dangerous for their brain.

You need to pay lots of attention to your essay structure. You still haven't grasped the idea about what features it should contain. Follow dumi's guidelines if you aim at a good IELTS band.