Daydreaming Experience Paper

Daydreaming Experience

When we are alone and bored, we suddenly become unconscious when a series of things distract our thoughts. This is commonly called indulging in a daydream. We may imagine about different things you plan to do in the future, think about what the outcome of our actions may be, and try to answer questions that randomly pop into our mind plus a plenty more things you're concerned about.

We have all experienced daydreaming while the teacher is discussing lectures in class. We can't help but make up stories in our head once we've started daydreaming. For instance, when I was too inattentive in class once, I began imagining of what the future holds for me. I started with college - a serious matter which I'm excited yet nervous about. Excited because I can see the independency and new world that awaits me; however, the thought of what kind of people I will be surrounded with and who my friends are going to be with makes me nervous.

Likewise, it's funny how sometimes my mind goes miles away to the different places around the world that I want to visit. It is one of my most-cherished dreams to have enough money and travel in various locations. I imagine myself taking pictures of lovely sceneries while collecting souvenirs from different countries. Just the thought of it makes me smile and excited at the same time.

Having my head in the clouds motivates me to reach my goals; it pushes me to strive, to get a hold of what I'm dreaming of. It's manipulating things to the way you wanted them to happen. Daydreaming also relieves stress and refreshes the mind. It is extremely natural so go ahead, feel free to create a wondrous world you want, and dream as big as you can.

I wouldn't open the Essay with "Sometimes" also do not use conjunctions. I would make it "When we are alone." The second sentence is cluttered, to make it flow better i would choose either know or call. For example it could read "This is commonly called indulging in a daydream." The final sentence in the first paragraph needs a lot of work. First you want to use specific, concrete language so be more specific than "stuff," "Things" and "plenty more things." Secondly I would shorten up your list to three or four things. Thirdly be conscious of your usage of different tense.

In the second paragraph I would eliminate, Admit or not, and begin with "We have all experienced." the first sentence is a run-on and should be split into two sentences. in the fourth sentence "the most to come" doesn't make sense i would either eliminate it or change it. In the final sentence it should be "that awaits me" rather than "it awaits me." Delete "and the likes" end the sentece with makes me nervous.

The third paragraph is fine. In the opening sentence of the fourth paragraph I would put a comma after strive and delete the word more. Delete the word like in the second sentence.

Thank you so so so much!!!

Rottencandy, what a great username!
Well, I think you should change all the "you" to "I"
It's manipulating things to happen the way you I want them to happen.

This essay has a lot of words that put me into a good state of mind. It has a surreal quality! I especially like the beginning. You got a great effect with that tentative, hesitant rhythm.

:-)