Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 5


Dress smartly or quality of work? I think it depends on our obligation in occupation.



nurainiyusuf16 47 / 73  
Oct 28, 2016   #1
Some organization believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance.
Discuss both these views and give you own opinion.


At present, dress smartly such as look office or business dress is requirement for plenty of organisation or companies. Others think that quality of work is more important than just good looking. I think it depends on our obligation in occupation.

Most of companies want to their employee use smart-dress since they want to attract people for buying their product or only for introducing their latest invention. Taking a sales promotion as an example. The company ask them to use good-looking dress because they get communication directly with consumes. It is also use for make a good image for their company. Due to that reason, when job-seeker looking for interview session, dress smartly is one of company assessments.

However, other organisations argue work quality of their employee is more important than appearance. For instance, most of start up such as Google inc. and Facebook do not obligate their worker to dress like an officer. These companies suggest to their employee to use their comfortable dress for work since they think casual dress make their worker feel enjoyable and it gives impact to their work effectiveness. The dress can make them comfortable even in work pressure.

Personally, I believe that every company has their own requirement for set their workers look. It depends on their obligation. If their job is relate with costumer or public, use smart dress is better. But if their tasks faced on computer or no living creature, use comfortable dress make them feel enjoy. I think both of them use for increase quality of employee work.

All in all, our dress work relate to our obligation since dress smartly is one of things that can support our work but not in all.

Medo91 4 / 9  
Oct 28, 2016   #2
Hello nurainiyusuf16 ,
Grammatical range and accuracy are one of the criteria by which your response will be marked, therefore you have to pay attention to your grammatical errors and structure sentence.

... employee use smart-dress can b e Most of the companies...

... for interview session should be when a job seeker ...

I advise you to pay more attention to grammar while writing and revise your essay many times.

Goold luck
badafebriani17 34 / 41  
Oct 28, 2016   #3
Hello. this is my suggestion

1. Taking a sales promotion as an example.

Taking ---> V+ing in front sentence-- i think "taking" that you mention is 'gerund'
so, missing verb in this sentence---> you can add tobe "is"
i think preposition "for" more suit for your sentence

e.g.: Taking a sales promotion is for an example.

2. It is also use for make a good ...

i think there are double verbs... "is" and "use"----> may be you can change --->is used
for make---> better you change preposition "for"----> to

e.g.: It is also used to make a good image for their company.

3. ... comfortable dress for work since they think casual dress make their worker feel enjoyable...
i think there is double verb---> you can add a conjunction

e.g.:These companies suggest to their employee to use their comfortable dress for work since they think that casual dress make their worker feel enjoyable and it gives impact to their work effectiveness.

4. Due to that reason, when job-seeker looking for interview session, dress smartly is one of company assessments.
there is missing verb---> you can add to be [was/were]

e.g.:Due to that reason, when job-seekers were looking for interview session, dress smartly is one of company assessments.

good luck
Fadhilahumar91 61 / 68  
Oct 28, 2016   #4
HI AINI...

I think it depends on our obligation in occupation. (IT REFERS TO???)
IN THE FIRST PARAGRAPH IS REQUIRED CLEAR POSITION SUCH YOU DISAGREE OR AGREE BETWEEN THE STATEMENTS, WHEN YOU THINK THAT THERE ARE OTHER FACTORS, YOU SHOULD MENTION BUT FIRSTLY YOU EXPLAIN YOUR POSITION.


Taking a sales promotion as an example.(NEED MORE EXPLANATION WHY THE SALES PROMOTION AS AN EXAMPLE)

All in all, our dress work relate to ...
A GOOD PARAGRAPH CONSIST OF THREE SENTENCES, NOT ONE SENTENCE. PAY ATTENTION ON IT.
THANK YOU
KEEP WRITING
mardian24 46 / 60  
Oct 29, 2016   #5
Hi nurainiyusuf16, let me give some comments on your essay
1. For the first it is better for you to paraphrase question, so it will make it different and score will be higher than before

2. ... business dress is requirement for plenty of organisation or companies ...
There are many organisations in the question, so in introduction you just need to paraphrase the question and make your own word

3.... other organisations argue that work quality of their employee ...
use a conjunction between argue and quality to avoid double verb form. I give an example for conjunction

Thank you
Break a leg


Home / Writing Feedback / Dress smartly or quality of work? I think it depends on our obligation in occupation.
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳