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Education-sat practice essay; other than school influences on education?



kendra 4 / 1  
Mar 5, 2007   #1
Below is another essay I wrote practicing for the SAT. I would welcome any feedback that can point me in the right direction to a successful SAT essay! Below is the prompt I received and then the essay I wrote. Thank you -kendra

Think carefully about the issue presented in the following excerpt and the assignment below.
The education people receive does not occur primarily in school. Young people are formed by their experiences with parents, teachers, peers, and even strangers on the street, and by the sports teams they play for, the shopping malls they frequent, the songs they hear, and the shows they watch. Schools, while certainly important, constitute only a relatively small part of education.

Assignment:
Is education primarily the result of other than school? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.


Education is not simply and intellectual ability that one achieves at school; it incorporates every facet of one's life that occupies any significant amount of time or importance. Such as a book read, a class drama production, a sport played and any other meaningful experience.

A famous quote says: "you are what you read". That can be considerably true because literature has the power to form opinions which in turn shape lives. Therefore, books and articles read are part of a person's education and formation.

Many times extracurricular activities mark a one's personality as well. I have learned many things from practicing competitive artistic skating. From self-discipline to good sportsmanship to self-esteem this experience has only enhanced my life with permanent values. These lessons have assisted me in innumerous other situations in my life.

Although most refer to education simply inferring school classes it goes beyond that. Someone in formed by his or her daily life and personal experiences.

EF_Team2 1 / 1703  
Mar 6, 2007   #2
Greetings!

Your essay was short, so I edited all of it for you. I think you do a marvelous job of following the prompt and applying good reasoning to your position. Good work!

Education is not simply an intellectual ability that one achieves at school; it incorporates every facet of one's life that occupies any significant amount of time or importance: a book read, a class drama production, a sport played and any other meaningful experience.

A famous quote says: "you are what you read." That can be considerably true because literature has the power to form opinions which in turn shape lives. Therefore, books and articles read are part of a person's education and formation.

Many times, extracurricular activities mark one's personality as well. I have learned many things from practicing competitive artistic skating. From self-discipline to good sportsmanship to self-esteem, this experience has only enhanced my life with permanent values. These lessons have assisted me in innumerous other situations in my life.

Although when most people speak of education they are simply referring to school classes, education goes beyond that to include someone informed by his or her daily life and personal experiences.

Best of luck!

Sarah, EssayForum.com
OP kendra 4 / 1  
Mar 6, 2007   #3
thank you!
a few more questions...
do you think it is too short?
do you have any idea what kind of a grade this might recieve when graded in an SAT?
thank you
-kendra
EF_Team2 1 / 1703  
Mar 6, 2007   #4
Greetings!

I'm afraid I'm not that familiar with the SAT essay requirements. If there is a word limit, you might want to make it just a bit shorter than the limit. I have no idea how they grade the essays. All I can advise is to make it the very best you can. If you have room to expand on your skating experiences, that might be good; I'm not sure what distinguishes "artistic" skating (is that as opposed to sport?) and it would be interesting to read more about it. That is the kind of thing that can make your essay stand out.

Thanks!

Sarah, EssayForum.com


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