Explain the main causes and effects of childhood obesity, and sugesst some possible solutions.

childhood obesity essay in writing ielts task 2

Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. Explain the main causes and effects of this problem, and sugesst some possible solutions.
It is said that the increasing rate of overweight children is one of the worldwide health issues in recent years. Obesity has a negative impact on children's life. In this essay, I intend to explore the sources of this phenomenon along with some possible solutions to it.

Chief among the causes of this problem is consuming food. It is often seen that many children are fond of burgers, chips and cokes. These types of food have easily been found in canteens are at high level of fat and sugar. Consuming them to excess results in serious ailments not only obesity but also high blood pressure, heart disease and diabetes. Moreover, in this modern era, parents those who are too hectic at work to cooking at home tend to prepare convenience food including frozen dinners, canned pastas and salty snacks for their children. This calorie-rich diet is making children obese. Another contributing factor is less active. The obese intensely stare at a computer or smartphone screen for hours. Therefore, the amount of calories unnecessary does not be released after feeding. It is recommended that kids around the age of 5 should have from 1,500 to 1,750 calories a day. Equally importantly, though, psychology issues also give rise to childhood obesity. Some negative emotions particularly in stressful or bored frequently appearing in adolescents make them lost control in weight. Clearly, there are so many unprejudiced and subjective reasons existing around us.

While being obesity has some adverse effects, there several measures can be implemented to address it.
Changing the eating habit might be an effective solution as there are amounts of nutritious overhauls. Take vegetables and fruits as an example. Swapping children's usual mid-morning snack for salad and chop a banana over breakfast cereal. Additionally, parents have been encouraged to take their children to go out so that they can enjoy outdoor activities such as camping, swimming and climbing. Furthermore, schools can add sports in their curriculum to maintain physical fitness in their students. Only doing physical activities, can extra calories be burnt, and balancing the portion of cholesterol in the blood.

In conclusion, It is an indisputable fact that obesity in children is responsible for many factors; however, a number of approaches can be taken to reduce the illness and strengthen a healthy lifestyle.

I think you should organize the body in 2 ways:
- 3 paragraphs presenting causes, effects and solutions respectively or
- 2 paragraphs, each paragraph presenting 1 cause, its effect and solution to it.

The essay requires presenting causes and effects, and propose solutions but you haven't included effects on your thesis. You should also work more on your conclusion. A good conclusion should include summary and restatement of thesis.

You are not properly developing your paragraphs. You need to use related information from topic to topic per paragraph. That means, If you start the topic off with food, then all of the succeeding information must related to that topic within the paragraph. That is what will create a coherent and cohesive presentation for that paragraph discussion.

By the way, you reference food in the essay. However, what you referred to in the discussion is junk or fast food. You must be specific about the type of food consumed because there are healthy food sources and there are bad food sources. You are referring to the latter so you should identify it as such within the discussion topic presentation for that paragraph.

You cannot balance the portion of cholesterol in the blood. However, you can control your cholesterol intake by consuming healthy food that counters the cholesterol produced by other foods in the body. That said, there was no need to present that reference in the discussion paragraph. All references to physical activity already made the discussion paragraph well informed. You bungled the presentation by adding cholesterol to the discussion.