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Freedom of Speech and the Internet



bettybetty17940 1 / -  
Dec 7, 2019   #1

speaking freely online



Technology has tremendously changed human's lives in the 21th century. Especially Internet has been increasingly playing an important role in our daily lives. It has brought us lots of benefits but also created some serious problems as well.

Nowadays, it is common to post photographs, feelings, and thoughts on social media. We can talk with different people all over the world immediately through the Internet. Moreover, people can get latest news and information in online world. But that cause some serious problems, such as--- fake news.

More and more people are aware of fake news and fake information is increasing online nowadays. It is hard to distinguish fake or true unless we verify it harder. In this information explosion generation, people wouldn't have the patience to figure it out. Most of the people would just read it and absorb the news and slide the page away. Under this circumstance, this gives some people a chance, a chance that they can spread and create fake news, fake information or animosity comments clandestinely in the online world.

On the Internet, people can talk whatever they want, so lots of people tend to wear masks online and hide their reality identities. These kind of people are often more aggressive than others on social media because they can use fake identities to things that they can't do in the reality. For instance, spreading hatred and malicious comments or argue with others online. These malicious comments might affect immature children. In order to prevent these kinds of conditions, social media must have son restrict rules to restrain users.

In conclusion, the freedom of speech on the Internet is definitely every human's right, but we need rules to restrict human's behavior on the Internet. We may have a long way to go before we create a benign online world. But once we are on the way, we are getting closer to the goal.

hungxd08 3 / 5  
Dec 8, 2019   #2
Hi,
I am really like your way to argue the problem.
However, you should review on some grammars and the use of relative pronouns.
For example: the first sentence and second sentence should be integrated into one sentence; fake news and fake information (or that is) increasing; distinguish between something and something; the freedom of speech on the Internet is definitely or definite;

Once again, I really like your view on this topic!
Hopefully, these comments might be useful for you!
Best regards,
Hung
Maria - / 1096  
Dec 9, 2019   #3
@bettybetty17940
Welcome to the forum! This is my feedback - hopefully, you are able to learn something from it.

The flow of content and manner of composition are both crucial parts of the writing since it will determine how "appropriate" your language appears to be. Try to be cautious of these two traits when reviewing your writing and revising your mistakes.

The first paragraph had an array of concerns ranging from inappropriate transition to one sentence to another up until the lack of usage of punctuation marks that are relevant for the building of information.

When you're introducing an issue to a set topic, try your best to link it properly. What I noticed is that your insertion of the topic of fake news just jumped out of nowhere without necessarily linking it to the idea of the freedom of speech. For this, you can answer this question and place the answer in the essay: why are people more inclined to distribute fake news with the actualization of the freedom of speech on the internet? Create a concise answer, paste it on the introduction, and properly transition to the core message.


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