Hello every one, I'm going to take TOEFL test soon, please help me check my essay if there's any things wrong!!
Please Help me~
Topic:
During the times of economic crisis, which of the following should the government spend less money on?
-Education
-Health Care
-Support for unemployed
When it comes to spending less money on education, health care, or supporting for unemployed during the economic crisis, there are a variety of viewpoints to be analyzed. Both opinions have their own pros and cons but are equally rewarding and worthwhile to be factored in. Nonetheless, in this essay, I will give voice to spending less money on education during the crisis for some reasons elaborated in the subsequent paragraphs.
To begin with, health care plays a vital role during economic crisis. All people think is that they need to get a job with enough payment to support their family and afford their heavy mortgage or other taxes. They will be wrapped up in busy working and often ignore their health condition so their might get sick easily. If governments do not support them with a discount or bonus on medicine caring, it is another big burden for every family. Keeping bad well beings of every individual workers is not a good way to improve the country's crisis.
Next, there must be a great deal of unemployed people during this period. If the government cut down this budgets for helping them get through this crisis or helping them find a job, they will boil with rage and upset. Moreover, some of them might have the protest on the street because they have nothing to do and are under in the great stress for surviving. This is a danger things in our society and our regular routines will be destroyed. Hence, supporting the unemployed must be done especially during this period.
Comparing with these two issue above, education seem to be not urgent and imperative. Besides, money is not the money is not the main factor of the qualities of education. For instance, the teacher who have higher payment is not absolutely teaching well in the school. In addition, education is the long-term investment so there are not immediate achievement will show up during these hard times. People will soon lose their patience and complain that the government are not using the money wisely because they do not see results and still struggle for living in financial problems.
To conclude, some might think that education is also very important to develop our children's learning and can be the fundamental bases of our country's future. However, I deeply convinced that it is preferable for spending less money on education during economic crisis for some reasons. Health caring and supporting unemployed are indispensable assistance from the government in these critical times.
Please Help me~
Topic:
During the times of economic crisis, which of the following should the government spend less money on?
-Education
-Health Care
-Support for unemployed
When it comes to spending less money on education, health care, or supporting for unemployed during the economic crisis, there are a variety of viewpoints to be analyzed. Both opinions have their own pros and cons but are equally rewarding and worthwhile to be factored in. Nonetheless, in this essay, I will give voice to spending less money on education during the crisis for some reasons elaborated in the subsequent paragraphs.
To begin with, health care plays a vital role during economic crisis. All people think is that they need to get a job with enough payment to support their family and afford their heavy mortgage or other taxes. They will be wrapped up in busy working and often ignore their health condition so their might get sick easily. If governments do not support them with a discount or bonus on medicine caring, it is another big burden for every family. Keeping bad well beings of every individual workers is not a good way to improve the country's crisis.
Next, there must be a great deal of unemployed people during this period. If the government cut down this budgets for helping them get through this crisis or helping them find a job, they will boil with rage and upset. Moreover, some of them might have the protest on the street because they have nothing to do and are under in the great stress for surviving. This is a danger things in our society and our regular routines will be destroyed. Hence, supporting the unemployed must be done especially during this period.
Comparing with these two issue above, education seem to be not urgent and imperative. Besides, money is not the money is not the main factor of the qualities of education. For instance, the teacher who have higher payment is not absolutely teaching well in the school. In addition, education is the long-term investment so there are not immediate achievement will show up during these hard times. People will soon lose their patience and complain that the government are not using the money wisely because they do not see results and still struggle for living in financial problems.
To conclude, some might think that education is also very important to develop our children's learning and can be the fundamental bases of our country's future. However, I deeply convinced that it is preferable for spending less money on education during economic crisis for some reasons. Health caring and supporting unemployed are indispensable assistance from the government in these critical times.