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I'm having trouble with my introduction. I'm afraid it may be deemed as plagerism?



Fiction 1 / 1  
Sep 24, 2012   #1
Hello!

First of all, the assignment is a literary analysis of a poem that is based off of a painting which is based off of a greek myth (The Fall of Icarus). We were given two poems to choose from and I decided to do a compare and contrast literary analysis ( which was okay with my professor). After four hours of writing, erasing, rewriting, erasing, writing, printing the intro and burning it to a crisp, I finally decided to start off my introductory paragraph with the myth, in my own words. However, I'm afraid it could be deemed as plagiarism? He said it is okay/expected to give a history of the myth, but I'm afraid my version of it may be to close to plagiarism, can I get your opinions? Should I just trash it and try a different route? ( Right now I'm not worried about grammar, as I go back through and fix it all. Also, I'm not a very experienced writer, so please don't poke fun at my attempts. I'm open to proper criticism, just not rude remarks! Thank you.)

" Fearless and excitedly Icarus flew, his hand-crafted wings made of wax and feathers beat feverishly in the sky. (Does this make sense? Is the sentence too long?) Prior to their escape from King Minos's tower, Daedalus, Icarus's father, warned him not to fly too high because the sun would melt the wax and not to fly too low for the sea would moisten the feathers on his wings. Soon, overwhelmed with sheer elation, Icarus forgot his father's adamant warnings. Higher and higher the young boy soared, the scorching rays of the sun liquefied his wings, causing Icarus to tumble into a sea only to be enveloped with death." - Hollie Keesee

EDIT: This Isn't my full intro, just the portion I'm worried about! :)

krushi 1 / 1  
Sep 25, 2012   #2
it should be "FearlessLY and excitedly..." because you need to have parallel structures while writing. Other than that I think it's fine. It's not really plagiarizing since you have it quoted. And also quote's are a good easy opener. They are my backfall if I can't think of anything else and I'm a senior this year.
OP Fiction 1 / 1  
Sep 25, 2012   #3
Oh, no. it's not a quote! I put the quotations there because I was trying to imply that it was my writing instead of me talking. Haha. I guess I should fix that so it doesn't confuse anyone.
DrDraco - / 1  
Sep 25, 2012   #4
You actually don 't have to worry too much abt the intro cauze it happens quite often that the examiners read till the first or second sentence of intro..

Good Luck!!!


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