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'High costs' - IELTS International sporting occasions


jennychen 2 / 2  
May 25, 2011   #1
Hi everyone, this is my IELTS essay. Pls read it and give me some comments. Thanks:

Popular events like the football World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

For years we have been accustomed to seeing people from different countries getting together at some popular events like football World Cup and other international sporting occasions. Apparently it seems that scenes alike provide us a unique and convenient way to communicate and have fun. Thus, despite its certain drawbacks and defects, I do strongly support the idea that well-know sporting events are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way. The reasons are chiefly as follows.

First of all, from a personal and psychological perspective, it is generally accepted that such championship would definitely generate connectivity and encourage continuity in communication among the competing nations, which is priceless for the international interaction. In other words, the contestants from diverse countries have to contact or complete with each other in the competition. History is replete with such examples. In the year of 1971, American and Chinese Ping-Pong teams both participate the 31th World Table Tennis Championships in Nagoya. Further, China invited the team and accompanying journalists set foot in Chinese capital, who were the first American sports delegation that had come to China since 1949. Then the event marked a thaw in U.S.-China relations that paved the way to a visit to Beijing by president Richard Nixon.

Apart from the one I have mentioned above, another equally important aspect is that, to attain the same end, sporting events can simply arouse one's activity and initiative, enlivening the formerly boring and tedious interactive process among different countries. The fanfare surrounding the Olympic Games and other international competitions show that sporting events are a common interest that is universal throughout the world. We can see that, during the period the World Cup takes place, most people all over the world, even the ones who do not like football, are concentrated on their countries results in this tournament. On the contrary, changed, there is a broad consensus that ordinary people, especially young people are not interested in politics. Because of this, sports rise above international politics or outside issues and are a relatively peaceful pursuit.

Nevertheless, it must be realized that international sporting events that capture the world's attention is often synonymous with high cost. The cost of hosting a major sporting event has increased significantly in recent years. It includes, not only, all the investment but also the heightened security. It is hard to meet these costs through sponsorship and ticket sales alone. Therefore, it can lead to higher taxes for the local population.

In a word, popular events are definitely indispensable in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way, especially for the reason of communication among competing nations and the common interest to the masses. However, it is even more desirable, and probably more essential overall if we can cut down the expenses of the major sports events.

a_safaei_m 1 / 2  
May 25, 2011   #2
hello my friend
your writing in really good and i think you have covered the topic completely. but I have heard that it is not good to say a personal and scientific reason together."from a personal and psychological perspective." but overall your writing really helped me, i hope i can write like this some day.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,335 129  
May 26, 2011   #3
I'll give some more ideas below:

Apparently it seems that scenes alike provide us a unique and convenient way to communicate and have fun.

well-known

In other words, the contestants from diverse countries have to contact or complete with each other in the games. ----I changed it, because it sounds awkward to say "compete in the competitions..."

...who were the first American sports delegation that had come to China since 1949. ---Wow, excellent. You really mastery of English. Do not worry about the IETLS! You will do well.

Then the event marked a thaw in U.S.-China relations that paved the way to a visit to Beijing by president Richard Nixon.---I think it was during that visit that Nixon witnessed acupuncture used for anesthesia during brain surgery!! He was impressed...

In a word, popular events are definitely indispensable in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way, especially for the reason of communication among competing nations and the common interest to the masses.----I used italics to show which word you were talking about.

:-)


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