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The increasing number of the elderly people and its influence on society


zen111 1 / -  
Jun 18, 2015   #1
Topic: In many countries, the proportion of older people is steadily increasing. Does this trend have positive or negative effect on society.

The increasing number of the elderly in many countries has aroused controversy about its influence on society. This essay will argue that aging population has more adverse effects rather than positive ones.

First, the overwhelming proportion of the old people would increase economic pressure to sustain older generations. Because of the growing demand for care services, the governments eventually spend more money on pension payment, homes for the elderly, hospital advancement. Moreover, there could me a heavy tax burden on working people as they need investment to do so. These factors causes imbalance in the economy. In other words, population aging is likely to bankrupt the social welfare, which is essential to help the older people with their lives.

Second, increasing number of retired people also lead to the decline in workforce participation in industry. The shortage of young, creative generation with strength has an considerable influence on the productivity and the economy in general. For example, it will be problematic in terms of heavy industry that require physical labour when the number of available staff are inadequate. The imbalance of gap generation in th proportion of workforce apparently will have a great impact on future economy system.

Nevertheless, older population can help reduce crime rates. As they are less likely to cause violence, robbery or accidents, which enhance the social security. For example, young people tend to have more problems with alcohol or drugs consumption. Apart from that, the longer life expectancy has also been attributed to public health care improvements and advances.

In conclusion, ageing population is believed to have negative impact on society rather than positive one. This problem can be a threat to the world economy, thus, lives of the old people are not guaranteed.

CDuke93 4 / 14 2  
Dec 13, 2016   #2
Hello Zen,

Your writing is well structured, I can tell that you've planned out how to deliver the message on the number of elderly people and effect on society. I'd like to give you some encouraging feedback.

It would be helpful to introduce your main talking points within your introduction. "This essay will argue that aging population has more adverse effects rather than positive ones.". Can you perhaps include the main three points in this statement? Including such statements will help the message flow even better, especially since the message of each paragraph is clear within the topic sentence.

Hope this was helpful :)


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