Unanswered [2]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


The information about the subjects of high school exam which are passed by both gender students



ifraanisa05 44 / 67  
Nov 28, 2016   #1
The bar chart below shows the percentage of students who passed their high school competency exams, by subject and gender, during the period 2010-2011.

A comparison of the information about the subjects of high school exam which are passed by males and females students during the period 2010-2011 is shown in the bar graph. Overall, most of subjects which were passed by girls especially in computer science experienced the highest percentage whereas boys gained higher than girls only in Geography matter

Initially, a sharp difference between boys and girls happened in few subjects such as chemistry, computer science, and geography. Girls students dominated in computer science at 56.3% while boys passed at 42.1%. The same pattern was experienced in chemistry because the percentage of females and males students gained by 16.1%. In contrast, boys got the higher percentage when they passed geography which was about 30.4% whereas females passed by 10.3%

On the other hand, some subjects passed by students witnessed a slight difference which was in physics and history. Foreign language and mathematics experienced the same. Foreign languages and mathematics which were passed by females gained higher than males by almost 1%, and 36.7% of girls passed the physics subject whereas boys passed at 34.6%. In addition, history was passed by females at 25.6% while 22.9% of males got through of it.


  • Bar Chart


ReskiRamadani88 43 / 56  
Nov 28, 2016   #2
Hello ifra, i will give you some suggestion:

... which are passed by males and females students during the period ...

Task achievement: Presents and adequately highlights key futures, presents a purpose that is generally clear, there are in consistencies in tone, addresses the requirements of the task.

Coherence and cohesion: arranges information and ideas coherently and there is a clear overall progression

lexical resource: Uses a limited range of vocabulary, but minimally adequate
nurainiyusuf16 47 / 73  
Nov 28, 2016   #3
Hello Ifraa!
Allow me to give you some suggestion.

... which were passed by girls got higher proportion, especially in computer science experienced the largest percentage, whereas boys gained ...

Girls students dominated in computer ...

... the percentage of females and males students ...

Pay attention to you subject verb agreement.
Hope it helps you :)


Home / Writing Feedback / The information about the subjects of high school exam which are passed by both gender students
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳