authorities should not pay for building tracks but motorways
Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Write at least 250 words.
It is generally acknowledged that figures of authority need not pay for building tracks but motorways. Actually, there are plenty of youths considering roads as the priority when it comes to driving for work or going to school owing to countless reasons. Personally, I completely agree with this statement since railways own a great deal of advantages.
In my opinion, rail service can give people a productivity boost in life. First, our timing would be guaranteed by express trains. Fast trains stop less to save us time and preclude our press for minutes in traffic jams before work. Second, subways would be much more preferred than roads as they can give us a greater sense of satisfaction. Lately, trains have been supplemented with advanced technologies, which lets people enjoy their moments. For example, I could read books online and have a drink without spilling it on a smooth-running Japanese express train.
The alternatives to railways such as roads would be further less productive. Firstly, developing more roads will be followed by the massive congestion. In terms of overpopulation, I doubt that joining the traffic in rush hours would certainly be everyone's biggest nuisance. Secondly, due to increasing use of roads, we will all have to pay a larger amount of tax and this is an insufficient funding for the constructions of more highways, overpasses and parking lots. That is why I believe, however, rail service price is simple and convenient. Eventually, our health would be at risk by emissions of CO2 from various vehicles on the roads, but this problem will be mitigated as for the fact that trains are fewer and environmentally friendly.
In conclusion, while driving on roads may be preferred by a number of people, it appears to me that road building is not a pressing need for the government to budget for. However, as long as nation invests smartly in railroads, our greater future prosperity will certainly be secured.
I'd be truly grateful if you do estimate my IELTS band score on this writing task 2 essay.
Hi there,
I have taken IELTS before. I think you will get solid 6.5 or more. Every paragraph is well made. You got your opinion, counterpart, examples and a conclusion. This is what the IELTS would want for a task 2 essay.
Here are some things I would do on first paragraph:
... figures of authority do not need to pay for building ..
... driving for work, going to school or other countless reasons. However, I, personally, would...
1st and 2nd sentences are disagreements for the topic. 3rd sentence is your opinion which agrees with the topic. I think you should put a transition word for your 3rd sentence. It will be more logical.
The rests are good. Good luck with your test.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 15460 Viet, with 325 words written in this essay, I can only assume that you did not bother to time yourself with your writing. When you do not time yourself while taking the practice tests, you will tend to write more words, but not leave yourself enough time to go back and revisit what you wrote in case you need to edit, revise, or write a totally new essay if you see that your original essay is not prompt responsive. The aim is to write a minimum of 250 words but no more than 300 because you need to leave at least 5-10 minutes before the end of the test to work on improving the text you just wrote. Please remember that timing is crucial when it comes to the proper development and presentation of your essay. Don't waste time just writing words. You need to make sure your paragraphs are coherent and proper developed. So use a timer next time.
If you don't mind, I will be scoring your essay on a per criteria basis because that is the only way that you will learn what your strong and weak points are in terms of Task 2 writing. With that said, expect my score for your essay to be highly different from the general score that you were given above . You may opt to believe whichever score you wish to consider as more accurate.
TA 4 - Your opening paraphrase does not give the reader a clear idea of what the original prompt is about. The way that you framed the restatement is difficult to understand as it is lacking some key points in the presentation. You did not create a strong supporting foundation for your upcoming discussion in the TA section.
The mistakes in the presentation are:
1. It is generally ... but motorways. - There is no such declaration in the original prompt therefore you misrepresented the original topic for discussion. This created an inaccurate representation of the discussion topic.
2. Actually, there are plenty of youths... owing to countless reasons. - Where is this stated in the original prompt for discussion?
The opening paragraph is always a restatement of the original prompt in the way that you understood it. Do not offer information not in the original prompt. That creates confusion for the reader and is the main reason why you do not have a solid foundation for this discussion essay.
C&C 5 - While you did present several key information in your paragraphs, you did not properly develop the discussion for any of the facts. As with any Task 2 essay, the single topic per paragraph helps you better form your paragraph explanations and allows you clearly develop your ideas in a method that is relevant to the discussion. You are not scored on the amount of information, but rather your ability to properly explain yourself in a manner that is clear and connected to the overall discussion you are presenting.
LR - 6 Although you have some issues with word usage, you have managed to use the words in the proper context in your presentations. You have problems with tense usage and subject-verb agreements but these are minimal and do not really affect the overall paragraph presentation.
GRA - 6 - you display an acceptable skill level when it comes to the creation of complex and simple sentence structures. While the sentence formations are not as proper as can be, these do not create any stress for the reader and still allows for easy understanding of your written work.
presents information with some organisation but there may be a lack of overall progression
