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GRE Issue essay: Cooperation or competition, which is best to instill leadership in young minds?


jvishal 4 / 7 1  
Jan 19, 2016   #1
Hi I wrote this issue essay within 30 mins. Please give me input on organisation, clarity and examples considered.

PROMPT:The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.


ESSAY:In an increasing globalized world, leadership has taken an important position in ensuring that any country progresses economically, politically and socially. Cooperation is not the only quality that a leader should possess, innovation and thinking out of box are also one of the most desirable qualities.Healthy competition begets innovation. Hence there should be a balanced approach between competition and cooperation to prepare the leaders for positions in government, industry and other fields.

Cooperation between people who have contrasting opinions leads to refinement of ideas. A leader valuing cooperation leads to progress in his field. For instance, Nelson Mandela, the first president of South Africa, after coming out of prison, engaged both Whites and Blacks in a healthy discussion (regarding democratic rights and principles) which paved way for the success of Rainbow nation as we have today.

While cooperation is important to brainstorm ideas, competition also brings out the best in the people. In the increasingly competitive world, where innovation is the new de facto Darwinian principle for survival, a good leader having an innovative mindset can propel his company and domain to reach great heights. For example, Microsoft and Apple in 1980s were fiercely competitive companies. They were headed by smart and out of the box thinkers namely Bill Gates and Steve Jobs. Due to such healthy competition, products released by these companies broke the barriers of innovation, thus advancing the field of information technology as whole.

When both cooperation and competition come together, the combination can give us remarkable results. Consider Steve Jobs of Apple, a leader who urged cooperation among his peers to innovate (because of external competition) has led to Apple being the most valuable company of this era. Therefore its important to instill both cooperative and competitive genes in young leaders, so that society can progress economically, socially and politically in the best way possible.

NourNour 22 / 39 7  
Jan 19, 2016   #2
Therefore,itsit is important to instill
OP jvishal 4 / 7 1  
Jan 19, 2016   #3
Hi @NourNour thanks for the correction. @vangiespen and others can you please look at my essay and give me more inputs.
pertiwi02 11 / 8 4  
Jan 19, 2016   #4
Hi jvishal :)

Cooperation between people who have contrasting opinions leadsHAVING CONTRAST OPINION LEAD to refinement of ideas.

I use reducing and omitting in this sentence :)

Enjoy your writing :)
ilankelo21 36 / 41 22  
Jan 19, 2016   #5
HI JVISHAL PERHAPS YOU NEED TO MORE CAREFUL IN USING SEVERAL WORDS SINCE IT SOMETIMES LOOKS INAPPROPRIATE. I SUGGEST YOU TO OPEN DICTIONARY AS YOU CAN TO ENSURE THE WORDS YOU MEAN..

THANKS

... leadership has taken an important position ROLE in ensuring that any country progresses economically, politically and socially ANY COUNTRY CAN DEVELOP ITS ECONOMIC RATE, SOCIAL AND POLITICAL STABILIZATION. Cooperation is not the only quality SKILL that a leader should possess, (...) of the most desirable qualities ABILITIES.

Cooperation between people who have contrasting opinions leads to refinement of ideas.

In the increasingly competitive world, where innovation is the new de facto ...

... who urged cooperation among his peers to BE MORE innovatIVE (because of external competition) has led to MADE Apple being BY FAR the most valuable company of this era.


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