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TOEFL essay large firm and small company - higher income in a large one



rmli 7 / 10  
Nov 3, 2009   #1
The following was the one of my essay for TOEFL, your review comment will help me improve me writing abilty, thanks in advance.
Some people prefer to work for a large company. Others prefer to work for a small company. Which would you prefer? Use specific reasons and details to support your choice.

Lots of student will face such a problem, to work in a big company or a small one. Each choice has benefits as well as disadvantages .for a big company, one will gain more knowledge and experience, but his work will focus on a narrow area. On the other hand, if one chooses to work for a small firm, he will have a wide experience and knowledge about the company operation, but his income will be very likely not higher then working in big company. Personally, I preferred to working in the big firm.

There are several reasons for me to choose the big company, and the main reason is that I wish to be a professional and I believe working in big company will help me to realize it. There are many opportunities to get in touch with the talent on their major in big company. Working with them, I will definitely benefit from their experience and skill. For example, once, I had worked at a company with several professional research engineering as research assistance for one year. Their knowledge helped me directly drive to the key of the project, and their experience saved me form impracticable ideas. Furthermore, in big firm, one had more training opportunities, which cannot provide by the small company.

The other reason for me is the income. For working in big firm the income will be higher. The wage will be very important for the new graduate whose family needs money. For example, one came from financial strait family, and had two little brothers studying in school. A good wage will be help his family form hard living.

Although working in a small company, one will gain full experience, and will obtain greater choice to promotion, when the company gets a good development. But the undeniable fact was the work was not steady, as the small firm was weak in the market economy.

After considering the above, I can get the conclusion that although working in small firm also have advantage, I will choose to work in the big firm.

EF_Team  [Moderator] 41 / 219  
Nov 3, 2009   #2
Lots of student will face such a problem, to work in a big company or a small one.

I wouldn't call it 'a problem' - it's actually great if students or graduates are offered any job ;).
Mustafa1991 8 / 369  
Nov 3, 2009   #3
hmmm, I'm feeling mercurial

- dilemma would neatly supplant "problem", following up on the post before this
- you start as though your reader has already been briefed on the topic; they haven't
- both choices*
- at a large company*
- does the big company offer "more knowledge and experience" compared to the little one? If so, why "... wide experience and knowledge about the company operation, but his income ...?"

- you prefer large companies to smaller companies, given the opportunity to work at either one*
- why are you referring to yourself "me" as though you're convincing "me?" Use "I"*
- "There are several reasons for me to choose the big company, and the main reason is that I wish to be a professional and I believe working in big company will help me to realize it."

This sentence is spliced; use a semicolon instead of comma.

That's a wrap, hope it helps.
bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 80  
Nov 3, 2009   #4
I like your essay...
I preferred to working in the big firm.
I will definitely benefit from their experience and skills .

please can you go to mt profile and check my essays.


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