I lost my friend - a sad event and what you learn from the event

I lost my friend

I lost my best friend, Jane last summer. Last year, on July first, she called me to accompany her. She said that she was suffered from depression and that she wasn't in a stable emotion. I heard her voice which was panic and helpless. However, I said sorry to her that I couldn't accompany her. At that time, I was all thinking about hanging out with my favorite cousin, Rex.

On the second day of July, I heard sad news about Jane. She committed suicide. I wasn't believed in the news. I thought it was just a joke. I immediately called her mom to make sure it wasn't true.

After I made sure that Jane was really passed away. I burst into cries. If I had come to comfort her that day, she wouldn't end her life. If I gave her more care, she might get through her tough times.

This grieved event teaches me to be more sensitive to our friends and families. Sometimes, a small greeting can warm one's heart, too.

I am not allowed by forum policy to rewrite this essay for you to correct the errors in your presentation. Any student who chooses to rewrite the total essay for you will also be suspended for doing so. The most I can do is offer a few correction points, without writing the essay all over again.

she called me to accompany her. - ... spend time with her
She said that she was suffered from depression - suffering
I heard her voice which was panic and helpless - panic and helplessness in her voice
I wasn't believed in the news. - I did not believe...

Unfortunately, these are the only corrections I can give you, without having to rewrite every error filled sentence that you produced in your essay. I strongly urge you to download more sentence building exercises so that you can improve your sentence structures and you can learn more about proper verb usage, adjective placement, and word choices. These will help you improve your writing skills for sure. Do not just focus on writing essays without improving your sentence building skills, you need to work on both simultaneously.