Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS - Music industry and copyright reforms



hds62 2 / 2  
Jul 14, 2012   #1
Many people in the music business feel that illegal music sites on the internet are a serious threat to the industry and more should be done to prevent them from operating.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Nowadays, world is becoming more obsess with information technology. Probably, it has several impacts on many industries such as musics and movies. Also, people in these industries believe that illegal websites publishing their products are the major menace to their career.

There are those who strongly convinced that publishing music albums illegally will result in death of this field. Because musicians could not get supported financially in order to produce more artwork. This issue, for instance, is more pressing in countries which do not obey copyright. Fans and advocates tend to either purchase copies cheaper from salesperson on streets or copy albums and artwork alternatively at home. Particularly, these illegal activities will affect musicians' personal lives due to their low incomes and investments.

On the other hand, there are those who argue that artists can benefit from illegal websites. For example, mostly these music sites are free and will not charge musicians for uploading and sharing their tracks and albums. Therefore, they can make people around the world familiar with their artwork easily. However, this theory is more beneficial for newborn artists who are willing to become popular and prominent celebrities. In fact, the majority of rappers worldwide have become famous and well known by sharing their own artwork on this kind of websites. Hence, they can be downloaded for free.

To sum up, I believe that both positive and negative sides are considerable. Moreover, I am convinced that reforms should be done regarding the copyright which allows artists, especially, musicians to make decisions on this dilemma.

ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 661  
Jul 14, 2012   #2
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Nowadays, world is becoming more obsess with information technology. Probably, it has several impacts on many industries such as musics and movies. Also, people in these industries believe that illegal websites publishing their products are the major menace to their career.

The question asked you about your opinion. At the end of the introduction you should clearly state your opinion. In addition, the topic is about music industries, not movies. So it would be better to avoid talking about movies because you mentioned movie industry in the thesis statement and this means that you want to write about both music and movie industries, whereas the topic is just about one of them-music industry.

To sum up, I believe that both positive and negative sides are considerable. Moreover, I am convinced that reforms should be done regarding the copyright which allows artists, especially, musicians to make decisions on this dilemma.

Reword the thesis statement in the conclusion to remind the reader what the essay was talking about. U said positive and negative sides, but the sides of which issue did you mean?

Regards
Ahmad


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS - Music industry and copyright reforms
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳