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It is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (e.g. dinosaur, dodo...)



vqwanttolearn02 1 / -  
Aug 13, 2021   #1
TOPIC: Task 2:
It is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (e.g. dinosaur, dodo...) There is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?



People have different views on animals that are in danger of extinction. It is argued that there is no reason why people should protect animal species because it is a natural process for them to become extinct. I strongly disagree with this argument and will support my argument in the essay below.

Firstly, not only the natural process but also humans cause the extinction of countless species. Humans have burned forests, cut down trees for different purposes such as agriculture, industrial factories,... As a result, there is no doubt that these activities have devastated the natural habitats of wildlife, endangered the survival of the Earth's flora and fauna. In addition, the increased demand for animal products such as skin, horns,...leads to the rampant poaching of wild animals. For example, the rhino horn is used as a status symbol to display success and wealth in some Asian countries, so poachers often hunt them. Therefore, rhinos are at risk that can be wiped out.

Secondly, animals play an important role in the balance of the ecosystem so people need to rectify the situation of mass extinction. Everything in nature is connected, if a species becomes extinct, other animals and people will suffer as the food chain. What is more, animals have aesthetic and socio-cultural values. They contribute to our rich bio-diversity that makes this planet great and beautiful to live in. Another point is that in numerous places around the world, many types of animals play an important role in different cultures. For example, in some religions, cows are revered and worshiped as gods.

In conclusion, the disappearance of many animal species occurs as a consequence of our doings. Their extinction will have a severe influence on different aspects of our life. Accordingly, we should preserve wild animal species on Earth in order to have a better life in the future.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Aug 14, 2021   #2
This is only an extent essay. It is not a cause and effect discussion. Therefore, the first reasoning paragraph that deals with the cause and effect of animal extinction is invalid, As that paragraph does not relate to the given discussion question, the examiner shall disregard that paragraph and leave it unscored. It will limit the scoring possibility in terms of:

- coherence and cohesiveness
- task applicability of all responses
- Discussion accuracy

These will be the reasons why the discussion will be scored based on a lack of properly developed opinion reasoning. The second, applicable paragraph will be scored as a part of the relevant discussion. The with needs to review punctuation usage rules. Punctuation marks are never used successively and ellipses are not used in academic writing. Proper punctuation usage is a major scoring consideration so these must always be used within the correct parameters.


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