Unanswered [7] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS task 1 - El Nino conditions bring about climate change in Australia and Peru



M3L1 26 / 6  
Nov 30, 2015   #1
The diagrams show the contrast climate change in Australia and Peru with and without El Nino conditions in the Pacific ocean. Overall, it can be seen that El Nino affects the weather in both countries. It is also affecting on crops in Australia and the number of fish in Peru.

On the normal conditions, Australia has a good rainfall and this climate is the best to cultivate crops because the wind which blew from west Pacific ocean is weak. In Peru, the east Pacific wind trades are strong which cause the cool water has more nutrients for fishes. In this cool water, fishes will have a plenty of food and increase their number.

As El Nino pushed eastwards by the strong winds from west Pacific, the warm water filled the Pacific ocean. On this situation Australia will experience drought. The fields are dried out and the plants died while the warm water which is lack of nutrients will decrease the number of fish and cause a lot of rainfall in Peru.


  • IMG20151130WA0002..jpg


INA 6 / 12  
Dec 1, 2015   #2
Hi Meli,
Your essay is quite good but i have just a few corrections for you.

Let me rewrite your introduction.

A comparison of the Australia and Peru' climate changes with the difference of the existence of El Nino conditions in the pacific ocean. Overall, it can be seen that El Nino affects the weather in both countries. What is more, it also impacts on Australia' crop and the amount of fish in Peru

... because the wind which blew blow from west Pacific ocean is weak.

In this cool water, fishes will have a plenty of food and increase their number.

As El Nino is pushed eastwards by the strong winds from west Pacific, the warm water filledfills the Pacific ocean.

The fields are dried out and the plants are die while the warm water ...


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS task 1 - El Nino conditions bring about climate change in Australia and Peru
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳