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Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with other people



taurus 2 / 2  
Jul 17, 2024   #1
Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

There has been much controversy about whether using social media every day brings more benefits. From my perspective, the positives of this trend exceed its negatives.

I believe that getting new events by using social media can bring some benefits. This is because knowledge is infinite and human knowledge is limited so we always need to learn more knowledge from the surrounding society and expand the knowledge we have.

Another advantage of using the internet to keep in touch with other people is that it allows people to communicate across the globe, making it easier to talk with family and friends. For example, after you finish a busy day, you can have a conversation with your relatives or with your friends. In my opinion, this way can reduce your anxiety and stress after a hard working day.

However, besides the good sides, using social networks every day also has some bad sides. The reason is network security is not safe enough so bad guys can send scam links and fake price information. In recent years, the number of people being scammed online has increased. And the scams have become more sophisticated and uncontrolled. Therefore, the number of people being scammed online has increased in recent years. And the scams have become more sophisticated and controlled. Some people are posting false information without any evidence. Fake news has eroded trust in traditional journalism and increased skepticism towards social media platforms.

In conclusion, utilizing social networking sites may bring about several drawbacks, such as increasing the risk of technology and internet addiction or cyber ​​violence. Nevertheless, I believe the advantages, including the source of information, huge knowledge base, and making life easier, as well as connecting the world, are stronger.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Jul 17, 2024   #2
Your essay is over discussed and will not be completed within the 40 minute time frame. Aside from that, you are not responding to the discussion platform as provided in the original prompt. Additionally, you have misled the readers with your prompt restatement sentence. These are the reasons why your essay will receive a failing score had this been an actual test setting.

It is important not to exaggerate your topic restatement. There is no controversy regarding this topic. It was merely an idea presented for discussion. There are never any inflammatory statements that will be made in the original statement so restating in a controversial manner will reduce your score.

The actual discussion sections are also problematic. You are discussing knowledge acquisition in general, when the statement is based on news sharing and its fast spread via the internet. So that paragraph is not related to the topic and will not receive a score. The second paragraph is correct and will receive some scoring consideration, but not enough to boost this essay to a passing score.

As for the negative side discussion, it does not work. It is not related to the previous paragraphs. There is no fluid discussion presentation. There is no connection between the ideas. The transition is not proper from one topic to the next. Right now, this is not the sort of essay that will receive a passing score had this been an actual test.


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