Pie charts, comparing the sales of books

The two pie charts compare the sales of books in the Famous Book Store during 2001 by book categories and by buyers belonging to different age groups and sex. It can be clearly seen that the parenting books was the most popular category during 2001; while interestingly, the biggest proportion of consumer group was men between 25 and 50 years old.

According to the first chart (left), the parenting books and cooking books, which occupied 25% and 22% of total sales respectively, were closely followed by psychology books which held 18% of total sales. Gardening books and Fantasy books with 13% and 11% of total sales, compared with, were about half of the sales of Parenting and cooking books separately. The least popular books were investing and technology books, with 7% and 4% of the total sales.

In terms of consumers, between the age group of 25 and 50, men with 28% of total sales and women with 23% of total sales dominated the consumer market. In terms of age group under 25 and over 50, women consumers occupied equal shares of 14%; correspondingly, the men of same age groups were 2% lower and 5% lower than women respectively/separately.

In conclusion, the parenting and cooking books were the most popular categories, and the age group of between 25 and 50 was the main buyers.

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Revising 20 ms

It is a good essay, but my teacher used to tell me never to start my ending using In conclusion.

how about "to sum up/ in summary/ to conclude"? which one do you think is the best one?

This does not compute. Simplify by comparing gardening and fantasy books to parenting books (each had only half of parenting sales.) Maybe worthwhile deducing that this indicates parenting is the most consumer relevant subject.


Shouldn't if be just one group that dominated the market? How can both parts of the total universe (M/F) dominate the market?


What do you mean by equal shares of 14% = equal to men??
Not sure what you are comparing herel: the men of same age groups were 2% lower and 5% lower than women respectively/separately : LOWER THAN WHAT SEGMENT OF women? Cannot make a meaningful observation based on these stats.

"In conclusion" or "To sum up" are both fine.

This first sentence is a tough one:
The two pie charts show information about sales at the Famous Book Store during 2001. Sales are shown according to book categories and categories of buyers (i.e. gender and age groups). --- this is how I would write it. It's hard to explain!

Linmark, I was confused by some of it, too. Maybe this part refers to % of total sales:
In terms of age group under 25 and over 50, women consumers occupied equal shares of 14% of total sales.
Anyway, that is why the chart is useful. It is hard to explain the information!