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The pie charts below show how dangerous waste products are dealt with in three countries



LadyOfClockwork 30 / 100  
Oct 6, 2017   #1
The pie charts below show how dangerous waste products are dealt with in three countries.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.


Toxic waste



The pie charts are presented for analysis of the disposal methods of hazardous waste materials employed in three countries - Korea, Sweden and the UK. Each figure represents a country in the list. In the essay, I will summarize the destinations of waste and make comparisons between the states wherever needed.

The bulk of dangerous waste is buried on land in the UK and Sweden, while waste recycling is strongly preferable in Korea. The technique is also employed on a modest scale in Sweden but does not come into use in the UK, the only country to dump waste materials at sea or treat them with chemical products. As to incineration, it is a fairly common treatment process in Sweden but rarely used in the others.

As an insight into the details, 82% of dangerous waste products end up in landfills in the UK, compared with 55% in Sweden and 22% in Korea. 69% of dangerous waste products are recycled in Korea, much higher than 25% in Sweden. The figure is even lower in the UK that does not recycle materials of this kind.

With regard to the treatments unique to the country, 8% of dangerous waste products are subject to chemical treatment and as many are dumped at sea. It burns roughly the same percentage of waste as Korea does, 2% versus 9%. In Sweden, however, as much as 20% of dangerous waste products are reduced to ash.

I would more appreciate it if you score my essay,

I have a question: in my third and fourth paragraphs, I uniformly used "dangerous waste products" to match "the percentage of"(82% of..., 69% of... etc.). Some textbooks recommend replacing "dangerous waste products" with similar expression including "hazardous waste products" and "waste materials" for language variety. Is the replacement necessary?

I sticked to "dangerous waste products", since I found a report from the U.S. Energy Information Administration (EIA), in which only "...% of U.S. electricity generation" is used.


eia.gov/energyexplained/index.cfm?page=electricity_in_the_united_states


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SankarshanaV 1 / 2  
Oct 6, 2017   #2
@LadyOfClockwork What is the topic of the essay? Is it "How dangerous waste products are dealt with in these countries"? (I am just asking this for myself)

As about your essay, I think it is good; but I feel you could go into more details about them, and give a little bit more extra information, like if the governments of these counties are trying to implement new laws which an help in more efficient and more eco-friendly way, and if the people support what their respective countries are doing with the waste, etc..

I think you should use Hazardous instead of Dangerous. It feels more orthodox.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15388  
Oct 6, 2017   #3
Gang, you need to use as many synonyms (different words with the same meaning) as you can in your essay because this shows a clear depth of your English vocabulary in relation to your Lexical Resource score. If you can vary your word usage enough throughout the essay, you will also find yourself unconsciously developing more complex sentences. So yes, the textbooks are correct and I would recommend the same in this instance. While the use of keywords are vital in the opening paragraph, variations of the term allows you to prevent reader fatigue since constantly using the same term can be highly redundant.

Do not base your work on the reports of others. Develop your own writing style. If you don't do that, you will be doomed to a limited vocabulary presentation in your essays. Sometimes, you will find yourself falling back on the original term, but only if it is required in a report. In a formal presentation, you may need to stick to one reference word. Since your English skills are being tested in this instance, you need to vary the presentation as best as you can.

In paragraph 3, the reference to the 25% in Sweden is a bit confusing. I would have phrased it instead as; "... much higher than the recycling rate of 25% in Sweden". There are instances when you will need to remind the reader of what the paragraph is about, as in this instance, which helps to clarify your reference material.

Please don't feel disappointed but I feel that the highest base score for this essay is still within the 7 bracket. I know that you so badly want to hit the 8 score but these things can't be rushed. Your improvements are continuous and admirable. I do not doubt that your perseverance will pay off in the future and you will eventually reach the score that is your ideal.
OP LadyOfClockwork 30 / 100  
Oct 6, 2017   #4
@Holt
Thank you Marry for your clarification. In China mainland, tens of thousands of anxious IELTS applicants are baffled with conflicting recommendations by dubious gurus of the test. Without you, I would hardly make any improvement. Your authoritative and conscientious advice can rarely be heard otherwise. I will keep improving my skills accordingly.

Though I do desire an 8, I'd like to reassure you of my patience. This month I have much time to practice. Very looking forward to hearing your further advice. :)


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